


Romantic - Volume 1

by jade_lil



Series: Book of Tears [3]
Category: Arashi (Band)
Genre: Book of tears verse, Fanfiction, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Ohmiya - Freeform, Originally Posted on LiveJournal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-07
Updated: 2016-01-07
Packaged: 2018-05-12 10:30:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 21,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5663032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jade_lil/pseuds/jade_lil
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Book of Tears Universe. Set a couple (?) of months since Ohno and Nino had gotten back together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [daisukidesu3](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=daisukidesu3), [Gambitsfox](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Gambitsfox/gifts), [sweetspicyhot](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sweetspicyhot/gifts).



It's almost midnight when Nino boarded his manager's car, exhausted beyond exhaustion itself as he settled back into the passenger's seat while his manager drove them home in silence. He took his phone out to check it for any unanswered calls and unread mails, finding one voicemail from Sho and three text messages from Ohno.  
  
He bypassed Sho's voicemail (as usual) in favor of checking Leader's messages.  
  
The first one was sent around 6:30. It said,  
  
_Done for the day, what about you? I was thinking of going fishing but then I remember you said something about a certain punishment for leaving you behind when me and Matsujun went on that LA trip. I'm free now until tomorrow so if you feel like punishing me, tonight's your chance. Anyway, call me when you're free.  
  
Satoshi._  
  
  
The second one was sent a little after 8:00. It said,  
  
_Do you remember where we put the cuffs? I can't find them. I don't know if they're in my place or yours, I can't find them in mine.  
  
I'm hungry. I don't know what I want to eat. Any suggestions?_  
  
Satoshi.  
  
  
And the third one was sent half an hour ago. It said,  
  
_Kazu.  
  
I. You know I was just rummaging around my stuffs trying to find that cuffs but then I came across this lyric sheet you probably left here without you knowing it and it's. It's a song, I think you wrote it and it's beautiful but I haven't heard you play this and I wonder if you... I wonder if you can teach me this and maybe we can sing this together?  
  
I. but if you think it's weird or something... anyway, forget it. Just. Call me when you're free.  
  
Satoshi._  
  
He wasn't sure what to make of the last message but after he read it, his chest felt tight and there's that urgency thrumming underneath his skin that he thought he was used to by now but realized he still wasn't. It always happened, afterall, when Ohno decided to say something so mundane, so sweet, breaking his heart into tiny pieces knowing he was the only one who could put the pieces back together anyway. His fingers were shaking as he tapped the reply button, fingers shaking still as he typed his reply away.  
  
_You're a bastard, you know that? Seriously, you are. And stupid because you do stupid things that makes my pulse skip and my stomach in knots because of your stupidity. I want to beat you silly right now but I also want to fucking kiss you and never stop because you're stupid and you do stupid things that doesn't make sense but I end up loving anyway. Seriously, you are stupid. But then again, I think I'm the stupider one because I love every single stupid thing you do. I hate it. I hate you. Just you wait and I'm really going to beat the shit out of you, you stupid stupid stupid_  
  
He hit SEND before he even managed to say anything anymore, hiding his burning face in his hand and wishing Ohno would be kind enough not to reply anymore. God, he felt like seventeen again, like he was back at his parents' house and waiting for Ohno's call in the middle of the night because Ohno promised he would.  
  
It's been too long but he knew that even then, even now, there was no turning back. He fell for Ohno and that was that. The older man stole his heart and hadn't given it back eversince, and well, he didn't have any intention of getting it back anyway.  
  
HIs phone beeped and it almost fell out of his hand, trembling as he unlocked his phone and tapped to open the message straight.  
  
Ohno's reply was a screen cap of the lyric sheet, and the sight of his familiar handwriting greeted him.  
  
_Before I met you, I never knew what it was like to be able to look at someone and smile for no reason._  
  
Were you talking about me here? Hmm. Sweet. Hurry back. I want you to look at me and see you smile for no reason. Or you can do more than look.  
  
Oh, and one more thing.  
  
This stupid guy loves you, too, you know?  
  
So much, actually.  
  
Satoshi.  
  
He was smiling when he put his phone away, at the same time his manager asked where he should drop him off.  
  
He pulled his cap low and murmured, "To Leader's place, if you please,"  
  
His manager said nothing and continued driving.


	2. Verse 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Note : Sappy/Cheesy lines shamelessly stolen from either FB or Twitter posts. YES, I AM SHAMELESS LIKE THAT XD

His manager didn't even bat an eyelash when he requested to be dropped off at Ohno's place,  
and he vaguely recognizes it as a testament to how long those people around them are aware  
about his and his Leader's obviously un-platonic relationship. In other times, he probably would  
have pondered on it long enough to give himself a headache but not today.  
  
He slips out of his manager's car exactly the same time it stopped in the front of Ohno's apartment complex,  
mumbling his thanks to his manager who simply nods back and murmurs something about some scheduled  
interview at two in the afternoon the next day before he drives away. Nino makes a mental note about it,  
pulling his cap low enough to cover almost half of his face and starts walking.  
  
He is on the elevator on the way up to tenth floor, to Ohno's apartment when his phone vibrates in his pockets.  
  
He fishes it out and finds two messages from Ohno, one is sent a minute after the other.  
  
The first one reads,  
  
 _Where are you? You didn't tell me where I should meet you, I'm getting worried here and not even  
your tooth-rotting song composition is enough to distract me. Jeez, Kazu. Why do you have to write  
such sweet, sweet things and then throw it away as if they mean nothing? I'm not sure if you even  
wrote this for me, I'm just guessing you did because... because I assume you're in love with me?  
but if not, oh well, forgive me for being such a presumptuous idiot but. Okay, that's a lie. I think I'm  
going to be super upset and super hurt if in the end you will tell me that this wonderful piece was  
written with someone else's face in your mind. But. If it's for me. I'd be super happy. Like, extremely,  
floating in the clouds happy.  
  
Oh, and I love you.  
  
I just need to stress that out in case you, you know, happen to forget it.  
  
Waiting for your reply :D  
  
Satoshi._  
  
  
The elevator dings just as he taps to open the second message, cheeks warm as he navigates  
through the hallway, his attention fully on his phone.  
  
The message reads,  
  
 _ILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVE  
YOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOU  
ILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOU  
ILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOU  
ILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOU  
ILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOU  
ILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOU  
ILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOU  
ILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOU  
ILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOUILOVEYOU  
  
NINOMIYA KAZUNARI. I LOVE YOU._  
  
He shakes his head at the same time he reaches the front of Ohno's door, fishes the keys  
in his bag and uses the one Ohno gave him to let himself in quietly, but not before he  
sends a quick reply to Ohno.  
  
 _You're an idiot. Of course the song was for you, who else do you think I spent hours  
thinking of other than you and your stupid face? Seriously, you're a moron.  
  
You're lucky I love you too. If not... never mind. I can't imagine not being in love with you anyway.  
  
And I'm hungry. So cook something good and feed me. I refuse to indulge your stupidity  
when I'm this hungry and I haven't had a real meal since that awful lunch  
they served during the meeting.  
  
And.  
  
I'm at your door. Get your lazy ass in here and carry me. I'm tired._  
  
He starts counting in his head the second he presses SEND, hasn't even managed to reach  
five when he hears hurried footsteps coming from the inside. He grins and leans  
back against the door, waiting for Ohno.  
  
"Kazu?"  
  
He smirks and waits until he can properly see Ohno and says, "Yes. Unless you're  
waiting for someone else to -" he trails because Ohno's arms are around him all of  
a sudden, and Ohno's mouth is pressed against his, stealing his words and his breath  
in one swift motion. He sighs into Ohno's mouth, lets Ohno direct him back to the wall  
as Ohno's body pins him there, Ohno's mouth hot and demanding against his own.  
  
When Ohno pulls away, there's something raw and hungry in the way Ohno gazes at  
him that makes his insides flutter. Ohno reaches up to finger his cheek, soft and tender,  
barely-there touches that warms him all the way down to his toes.  
  
"You received my mails?" Ohno whispers, his breath warm and comforting as it hits Nino's face.  
  
"Yes," he returns, breathless, because Ohno graces his cheek with another open-mouthed  
kiss that leaves him shivering. "And they're all stupid," he adds, curling his fingers against  
the front of Ohno's shirt.  
  
Ohno hums into his skin and holds him close, presses even closer as Nino tiptoes to  
gently bite the tips of Ohno's nose.  
  
"You're lucky I love you and your stupid brain,"  
  
Ohno chuckles and holds him holds him holds him. When Ohno loops an arm  
around him, leans down to press their foreheads together before Ohno ducks  
down for a kiss, Nino is there to meet him halfway.  
  
"I'm glad," Ohno rasps out when they part, and Nino feels tingly all over, his mouth  
full and bruised and tender because of Ohno's kisses. He squeaks when Ohno's  
arms come down to his hips and he is suddenly being lifted up from the ground,  
his legs twining around Ohno's waist in a sort of automatic reflex.  
  
"Hey!" he squeals, hands finding Ohno's arms and shoulder, hanging on for dear life.  
"Put me down, you -"  
  
Ohno gives him sound kiss on the cheek before Ohno's mouth found his again,  
kissing him hard and fierce.  
  
"You asked me to come to the door and carry you," Ohno says when he pulls back enough  
to talk, smiling serenely at Nino. "I'm just following orders,"  
  
He finds himself rolling his eyes to the heaven. "You sappy jerk -"  
  
"You love this sappy jerk, anyway," Ohno cuts in, his smile still in place as he starts to back them  
away from the door. "Well, as much as he loves you so stop complaining." Ohno grins, squeezing  
his butt affectionately as Ohno carries him inside.  
  
He finds himself leaning down to nuzzle Ohno's temple, heart full to bursting as he buries his  
face against the dip of Ohno's neck.  
  
"I won't," he whispers, tightens his hold around Ohno's shoulders as Ohno squeezes him  
tight in return. "You love me this way, too, so _you_ stop complaining," he counters, but not  
without so much fondness.  
  
Ohno presses another kiss against his hair. "Okay," Ohno agrees, soft and indulging, "Okay, Nino."  
  
He smiles into Ohno's neck and doesn't let go.


	3. Verse 3

Dinner was a quiet affair, at least as far as eating was concerned because the thing about Ohno and food was that one shouldn't, ever, attempt to separate one from the other especially when Ohno is hungry. Nino knows he'd immediately fall into second place (maybe even third) with regards to the 'Ohno Satoshi priority ranking' especially where his stomach is concerned.  
  
With the dinner done and the dishes had been placed on the dishwasher, Ohno happily tucked him against the older man's side and led him towards the bedroom with a quiet smile.  
  
They've gone to shower separately, (Ohno had to dig his closet for clothes that he could lend Nino) and when they were done, Ohno hadn't let him go. They were lying on their side, his head pillowed on Ohno's arm, one of his legs is thrown over Ohno's hips and the other is squeezed in between Ohno's. He's got his hand underneath Ohno's shirt, palm spread over Ohno's abs, simply feeling the rise and fall of Ohno's abdominal muscles with each breath Ohno takes.  
  
No one talks for a while but he figures Ohno is waiting for him to bring the matter up on his own because Ohno is a bastard like that. He wants to say something, of course, of course, but at the same time, he doesn't want to because he knows he'll end up blushing like a fucking school girl the minute he opens his mouth. But.  
  
But Ohno is looking at him as if he is waiting for something and Nino wants to bitch slap the smirk tugging at the corners of the older man's mouth or better yet kiss it away. It's actually fucking confusing.  
  
"Stop looking at me like that, you creep," he murmurs, trying to hide his eyes against Ohno's arm but Ohno is immediately there to stop him, the jerk. Ohno's thumb hooks under his chin, tipping his face up. He keeps his eyes closed for good measure and hears the telltale sound of Ohno's chuckles.  
  
"Hey, open your eyes, come on," Ohno coaxes him, stroking his chin softly. He huffs and tries to shy away from Ohno's insistent coaxing, stubbornly refuses to open his eyes despite Ohno's requests. "Kazu, look at me, hey,"  
  
"Don't wanna," he whines, "leave me alone, will you? I'm tired so can you please stop being a creep and let me sleep already?"  
  
Ohno chuckles again and this time, Nino feels Ohno's fingers on his cheek, cupping his jaw and stroking the soft skin  beneath his eyes. It's that gesture that makes things in Nino's chest tight, because it is so intimate and possessive, like Ohno is saying so many different things all at once through touch alone and without even as much as saying anything. Nino thinks it's a little distracting, and all things considered, beautiful.  
  
Damn it, he's so gone.  
  
"Not until you open your eyes and hear me out," Ohno says, insistent, because Ohno is stubborn, too. Nino feels his lips curl into a smile and he tries to swallow it down. It didn't work.  
  
He opens his eyes and huffs, pinches Ohno's hip in retaliation. Ohno squeaks and he rolls his eyes in return. "Fine," he grinds out, squinting at Ohno's god-fucking-gorgeous face. "What the hell do you want now?" he snaps, just for effect, but he knows Ohno can read right through him. He is grinning, afterall, and his hand on Nino's cheek is warm; Nino finds himself unconsciously leaning into it.  
  
The corners of Ohno's mouth curls into a sweet smile that just about broke Nino's heart into pieces. He doesn't know what he did to deserve that smile, and for the life of him, he's still not sure how in hell he got so lucky. Of course he knows his points and his own charm enough to use it to his advantage, used it enough to practically charm the pants off of everyone wearing them a few times over the course of his career but his heart is never ready when he finds Ohno looking at him like that.  
  
Because Ohno is gazing at him as if there is nothing that makes him happier than being here, with Nino tucked so close to him, and Nino's heart is never strong enough to handle it.  
  
"I really love you," Ohno says, voice just loud enough to for Nino to hear and Nino's heart swoops as if on cue. Trust Ohno Satoshi to drop the bomb when he least expected it, and fuck it if he's going to survive the night without either dying prematurely because of the way his heart is behaving inside his chest or shutting Ohno up permanently just to stop him from saying (embarrassing? cheesy?) things that will kill him in the long run, anyway. "A lot," Ohno follows and Nino is sure his face is on fire with how fucking hot it suddenly feels.  
  
He really should do something to shut Ohno up or else he'll never stop saying embarrasing things that will eventually kill him. Ugh.  
  
"O-Oh-chan, you really should shut up now before I consider -"  
  
"And I know sometimes I mess up and do things that make it seem like I don't care but trust me," Ohno pauses here, outright ignoring Nino and staring right into Nino's eyes as he thumbs Nino's cheek, softly, "You're my world, Kazu,"  
  
"And my everything revolves around you and you alone," Ohno follows, a small, almost private smile gracing his lips and fuck, Nino wants to kiss him.  
  
So he did.  
  
"One day, you're going to fucking kill me," he says, ragged, into Ohno's mouth when they pull apart to breath air back into their lungs. "I swear to god, I'll end up dead and no one will know why,"  
  
Ohno laughs against his lips, tugs him closer with a hand down the small of his back, a gesture that is so intimately possessive but it's something that Nino is grown accustomed to now because Ohno always holds him that way, especially when they're in bed together. And Nino likes it, loves it, despite the fact that Ohno is never going to hear him admit it.  
  
"I'll revive you with the power of my love, Kazu," Ohno whispers, still mostly against his lips, and bites his bottom lip lightly.  
  
God, Nino is so charmed, so in love, so gone. "Oh god, shut up!"  
  
Ohno simply laughs and kisses him again.


	4. Verse 4

He wakes to the feel of someone's fingers stroking his jaw.

" - 's early," he grumbles and tries to bury his face against the pillow but Ohno is immediately there to stop him, cupping his face and leaning in to nuzzle his cheeks. "Oh-chan, I'm going back to sleep," he whines, pushing Ohno's face weakly. "Let me go,"

Ohno simply hums and presses closer, ignoring him entirely; it's days like these that makes him want to question the merits of loving someone so fiercely like he loves Ohno because honestly, it drives him crazy everytime he wakes in the morning to the feel of Ohno's warmth clinging into him, to the scent of Ohno's skin against the sheets, drives him enough to want to stay like this forever and not leave the comforts of Ohno's bed just to be with him for the rest of the day (or his life, forever).

"Alarm's going off in five minutes, though," Ohno mumbles into his cheek and he grumbles something indistinct under his breath in return. Ohno chuckles, fingers worming to the back of his head to steady him. "Come on, wake up; I want to see your face clearly before you scramble out of bed to take a very quick shower,"

"You'll have plenty of time to look at my face later since we're shooting three episodes for VS, or have you forgotten?"

"Can't," is Ohno's simple answer.

"Why?"

"I'm gonna be busy trying to stay awake, so, no," Ohno says, "besides, I like your face in the morning better than the one you tend to show on TV. So come on, let me look at you,"

A whining sound escapes the back of his throat and Ohno chuckles some more, coaxing him with insistent fingers, warm breathe and even warmer strokes against the nape of his neck. He gives in and pops his eyes open, groans when the first he sees is the almost blinding grin on Ohno's face.

"God, it's so early," he complains though he is unconsciously leaning into Ohno's touch like a puppy seeking warmth, feels as Ohno wriggles closer to catch his legs in between Ohno's own. He groans and reaches over to twist his fingers against the fabric of Ohno's shirt, closing the tiny distance between them so he can bury his nose against the dip on Ohno's collarbones.

"Kazu," calls Ohno, "hey, come on, let me see you,"

"You're awful," he grumbles but dutifully raises his face so Ohno can squint at him, Ohno's thumb rubbing soft touches on the skin beneath his eyes.

"You know I'm not," Ohno whispers and a shiver rakes his spine when he feels Ohno's lips against his closed eyelids, soft and tender, like a butterfly's touch. "I just want to fully enjoy this rare chance of waking up with you in my bed, since I'm not sure when this is going to happen again," Ohno says, then, "and because I really, really want to stare at your I-just-woke-up face before it's gone,"

He huffs out a snort as he pinches Ohno hip. "This is my only face, what are you even talking about?"

"But you have such cute face in the morning!" Ohno insists, cupping his chin and tilting his face up for a kiss aimed to the tips of his nose.

"Only in the morning?"

Ohno giggles and kisses the side of his mouth. "No, I mean you're cute but you're cuter in the morning, when you just woke up. I like how you look all grumpy and sleepy, like when your mouth curls and your eyes are close, damn, I want to just wake you up with a kiss or two and maybe I'd get lucky and you'll give me more than a kiss but. But I know you wouldn't like it, so,"

"As if you haven't already," he grumbles, squinting at the clock sitting at the bedside table and heaves a sigh. Two more minutes before he has to get up. "Alright, I'm awake now and you already saw what you want to see so let me up already,"

Ohno lets him pull his legs away from where they've been cocooned in between Ohno's legs and is well on his way to crawl out of bed when Ohno's arms catch him around the waist and pulls him right back into Ohno's sturdy chest, Ohno's lips pressed against his ear as Ohno murmurs,

"But honestly, it really doesn't matter whether you're cute or not because for me, you're always beautiful, Nino. In my eyes, you are perfect and that's that,"

"Oh-chan -"

"Almost two decades after, I still think that you're the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. I know I haven't told you this, but well, it's not like there's been a chance to really say this but, you know, back then when we first met?"

He waits, heart pounding hard through his chest.

"It was like I was lost all along, wandering around life, doing what people expected me to do knowing that there's something I want more out of life than what I've been doing back then," Ohno starts, breath warm and his hold around his waist tight and familiar, "But then my soul saw you and it kinda went, 'Oh, there you are; I've been looking around for you,' and since then, I knew I wasn't lost anymore. You were there to complete the missing pieces of my life, afterall, so it's good. It's good, as long as you're there, as long as we're together,"

He knows he's going to end up late but right now, he doesn't really care as he turns around, surprising Ohno as he throws his arms around Ohno's neck and slams his mouth against Ohno's own.

He pulls back just far enough to say, "Kiss me, you sappy bastard," in a ragged, almost shaky voice, but it's okay because Ohno simply smiles at him and tugs him in for a returning kiss that is a thousand times passionate and a million times better.


	5. Verse 5

“I’m sorry I’m la –“ he mumbles his greetings at the same time he pushes the door to their greenroom  open, the rest hang loosely at the tips of his tongue the minute his gaze zooms in on Aiba who is presently crowding Nino against the refreshment table. Aiba’s gaze is focused and intense while Nino looks honestly torn between shoving Aiba off and throwing his freshly-poured coffee right into Aiba’s face.  
  
“Let’s runaway together,” Aiba breathes at the same time he reaches over to touch the side of Nino’s neck, curling his palm against that spot he remembers peppering with soft, butterfly kisses this morning before Nino left for work. “You and me, my love,”  
  
Nino outright scowls but then Aiba glares mildly at him, like a gentle reminder, and he watches as Nino tries to rearrange his expression into some semblance of want or longing but fails pathetically because to be honest, Nino only ended up looking a little constipated. Swallowing back his snickers, he leans against their dressing room’s wall and watches the spectacle happening in the front with dry amusement.  
  
“You and me,” Nino repeats when Aiba nudges him yet again and he vaguely hear Aiba’s “Say your lines, you dumbass,” realizing belatedly what the sight before him really means. So Aiba wasn’t trying to force himself on Nino – his Nino – and that whatever Aiba was spouting moments before must be his lines from his newest drama.  They’re probably rehearsing, he thinks, and then finds himself suddenly grinning at the memory of Nino’s face the previous night and this morning, too.   
  
Embarrassed Nino is adorable, he thinks, remembering the way Nino all but blushed an awful shade of red when he told Nino what he means to him. He’s not even the type to say those mushy stuffs just to get inside someone else’s pants before (and in this case, he wants an in not only inside Nino’s pants but to everything that Nino owns), and he’s never vocal about his feelings towards someone, never have been, but with Nino, it’s a completely different story. He finds that he likes saying those things especially because he means them, that it makes him happy knowing that Nino likes hearing them despite the fact that Nino will never admit it out loud.   
  
“Together,” Nino says,  looking so close to throwing up or maybe bursting into a fit of giggles and he found himself  leaving the comforts of the wall before any of those happen and walking the rest of the way to where Aiba and Nino are.  
  
“Ah Leader!” Jun notices him first, but he ignores their youngest member in favor of walking straight to Nino, pulling the ring off his finger that the stylist handed over along with those other accessories he would wear for the shoot.  
  
“Leader?” it is Aiba this time but just like he did with Jun, he ignores him too.  
  
His gaze is on Nino, and the amused and touché confused expression on Nino’s face; he smiles and Nino’s eyes widens marginally the minute Nino’s eyes catches the ring dangling in between his fingers.   
  
“Leader what the hell are you –“ Jun hisses from where he’s previously checking out his hair, sounding upset and a little out of  breath. It’s probably because Jun is aware he’s up to something wholly embarrassing judging with the way Nino is glaring at him while Nino is shaking his head furiously from where he’s at, but he ignores it just the same.  He keeps on walking, eyes glistening with mischief and adoration and stopping only when he’s just about two steps away from Nino.   
  
It’s when he smiles and takes Nino’s hand when he’s close enough to do so that he vaguely hears Jun grumbles _what the fucking hell?!,_ grinning as he plants a soft kiss against the back of Nino’s palm and tugs Nino into him. Aiba steps out of the way, grinning, as he folds his arms around Nino’s waist.  
  
He glances at Aiba briefly and mouths, “Sorry, Aiba-chan, but this man belongs to no one else but me,” he says, feeling the tell-tale tremble of Nino’s body beneath his hands.  He leans in and presses his mouth against the side of Nino’s temple and winks at Aiba who is trying his hardest to smother his giggles by slapping his palm over his mouth, but failing.   
  
“Really, Leader?”   
  
He nods. “Yeah. Personal property, actually,” he adds and this earns him a good-natured shove from Nino.   
  
“Let go of me, you imp,” Nino mutters, and he’s so pink that the urge to run his fingers across Nino’s cheeks is so strong he barely able to stop himself, tightening his grasp around Nino’s middle to pull him in.  
  
“Can’t,” he tells Nino in utter seriousness, “if I do that, someone will certainly come and take you away from me. I can’t let that happen, I just can’t. I refuse to,”  
  
“Oh god, seriously –“ Jun groans, sounding pained.   
  
“Yes, Leader!” Aiba husks out, obviously playing along. “I’ll steal Nino from you if you’re not careful,” Aiba adds, at the same time Jun yells, “Stop encouraging them, Masaki!”  
  
“See?”   
  
“You are both insane,” Nino bites out, still blushing and batting his hands away, wriggling out from his grasp. “Let go of me before I beat the living shit out of you,” Nino says, turning to Aiba briefly to glare at him. “You, too,”  
  
He shakes his head and lifts his hand, grasping Nino’s chin, his smile still in place. “If I had my way, you’re never leaving my bed for the rest of your gorgeous existence but as it is, we both need to work so I might as well do something just to let everyone know that you’re off limits already,” he says, as he gets down on one knee, looks up at the shell-shocked expression on Nino’s face.   
  
For a second, Nino looks like he might pass out but then Nino reaches down to grab his shoulders probably to steady himself, eyes wide and his mouth agape.  
  
“Satoshi, what the hell!” Nino hisses as he vainly tries to pull him up but he simply shakes his head and meets Nino’s gaze straight on.  
  
He smiles and presses another kiss against each of Nino’s knuckles, before he slides the ring onto Nino’s ring finger and whispers, “Will you be mine forever, Kazunari?”  
  
“Oh my god, please kill me now,” Jun groans at the same time Aiba hoots loudly. The door to the green room opened the fifth time around, Sho emerging behind it, Sho’s gaze immediately zooming in onto him and Nino.  
  
“Satoshi-kun, it’s not even ten o’clock yet, and you’re already on your knees, proposing?” Sho says, sounding exasperatedly fond.  
  
He shrugs without glancing at Sho, nudging at Nino who still looks like he might swoon. “Had to be done one way or another, Sho-kun, or else someone might do it first and take away what’s mine. Can’t do that, you know?”  
  
Sho simply hums and puts his newspaper down before sliding on the couch next to Jun.  
  
“Fine, but will you please hurry things along before the managers come in and see you,” Sho says, patting Jun’s knee knowingly. “I think Silver Wolf-san will be here in about two minutes and you wouldn’t want to make him cry so early in the morning, right?”  
  
He grins and nudges at Nino’s hand again. “You heard that, Nino?” he asks with a pout. “Come on, let me hear your answer already,”  
  
“Oh my god, Leader, are you seriously –“  
  
“Relax, Ma-chan,”  
  
“How can you ask me to relax when something silly is happening in front of me –“  
  
“Shhh,”  
  
He kneels up properly and aims another kiss, this time to the inside of Nino’s wrist.   
  
“Answer the question, Nino,” Sho coos from his place on the couch at the same time they all hear the sounds of Sho’s manager’s footsteps. “Or else you won’t get another chance like this. Come one, before Silver Wolf-san –“  
  
“Fuck, alright, YES!” Nino grounds out, tugging him up and swatting him upside the head; he doesn’t mind because he’s too busy trying to hug the shit out of Nino and too busy trying to kiss Nino on the mouth to even care that Nino is hitting him and grumbling curses under his breath.  
  
+++  
  
Nino spent the whole hour staring dreamy-eyed at him, flexing his ringed-finger absently that the gesture was nothing but adorable.   
  
At least until they all went back to the green room and the stylist had asked for the accessories, including the ring he had put on Nino’s finger.  
  
“Oh, I didn’t remember handing that over to you, Ninomiya-san, but anyway –“ she’s not able to finish what she is saying because Nino is throwing the said ring right into Ohno’s face and shouting, “Satoshi, you bastard, I am going to kill you!”  
  
“Oops,” He grins and hands the ring  back to her waiting hands and bowing his head in apology.


	6. Verse 6

“Kazu, hey,” he calls, nudging Nino’s foot. “Come on, I apologized already, isn’t that enough? I told you it was not a joke, I just, you know, acted on pure impulse and I kinda forgot that was not _the_ ring that I was supposed to –“  
  
“I thought you said there was _no_ ring?” Nino cuts in, sparing him a quick glance.  
  
“There wasn’t, but –“ he answers, then sighs when Nino takes his attention back to his console, already ignoring him again. “Aww, come on, don’t be like that,” he mumbles, leaning over to rest his chin against one of Nino’s knees. Nino is still ignoring him and well, he can’t really blame Nino, it’s his fault afterall.  
  
“Seriously Nino, you’re that upset?” he asks, tapping a complicated rhythm against Nino’s hip gently; he is fairly sure Nino isn’t upset about the proposal-gone-wrong per se, but with the embarrassment that went along with it. Well it should be a given, and he’s an idiot, Nino said so himself.  
  
“Honestly, I’d buy you a ring right now if that’s what you want,” he hums, chin still resting against one of Nino’s knees and it is an indication that Nino’s not that upset because he hasn’t hit him yet, hasn’t kick him out of Nino’s apartment, either. He guesses he should be thankful that Nino didn’t shut the door to his face when he knocked on Nino’s door earlier, too. “But I remember what you said about rings being a girl thing and that –“  
  
“Then what the hell was that stunt you did back there earlier?” Nino grunts, sounding more than a little annoyed. He swallows hard and gently reminds himself to be careful or else he really will end up kicked out of Nino’s apartment at this point.  
  
He tilts his head and gives Nino his most charming smile, one that he usually saves for special occasions and special people, like Nino. “It wasn’t a stunt,” he disagrees with a little shake of his head, “It’s what I felt like doing at the time so I did it,” he says, wishes Nino has the ability to read his mind right now because despite the fact that things ended up like a bad joke, he really did it seriously. The words he told Nino were true, everything up to the point where he slid his borrowed ring onto Nino’s finger.  
  
He meant every word, every gesture and he honestly totally forgotten that the ring wasn’t his until the stylist came to collect it.  
  
To be honest, he thinks it is also partly Aiba-chan’s fault why he did that. Nino told him he was stupid when he brought it up so he didn’t try again.  
  
“You made me look like a fool in front of the others,” Nino says, coldly, and he finds himself leaning down to mutter his apologies against Nino’s clothed knee. “I hope you know that,” he nods, once, then again without saying anything.   
  
A moment later, he raises his head and finds Nino averting his eyes just in time. He smiles a little and nudges Nino again.  
  
“Kazu,” he calls, nudging Nino’s knee with his chin, thankful and equal-parts happy that Nino hasn’t done anything to dislodge him yet. God, he really loves Nino so much right now. “Hey, can I ask you a question?” he tries, though he knows he’s probably going to be ignored anyway.  
  
But then Nino hisses, “What?” without taking his eyes away from his game and he can’t help but smile at that.   
  
He shifts his weight onto his other knee and tilts his head just so, his right cheek resting on Nino’s kneecap this time as he looks up at Nino.   
  
“Say I want to propose to you this time –“  
  
“Don’t bother, I won’t let you –“ Nino cuts in so quit but he shakes his head and stops Nino by reaching up to put two fingers over Nino’s lips to silence him.  
  
“No, hear me out, okay?” he says when Nino simply scowls and bats his hand away. “Forget about what I did earlier and let’s pretend I’m going to propose to you for real this time, do you really want me to do it with a ring or with something else instead?” he asks, honestly curious, though somewhere at the back of his mind, the answer lies dormant, like some unforgettable information that just sticks at the back of his mind.  
  
Nino looks at him as if he’s crazy, but then something in Nino’s eyes tells him that he’s asking the right questions this time. Then Nino looks down and away before he takes his attention back to his console, mouth turning up in one corner.  
  
“As if you’ll do it,”  
  
He knows he is grinning and well, he can’t exactly help it. “Try me,”  
  
Nino still doesn’t look at him when he says, “Then I’d say a new guitar or a new game console would be the better choice instead of –“   
  
The door bell rings, effectively cutting Nino off. Nino looks down at him and blinks. “I’m not expecting anyone,” he says, then, “are you?” he shakes his head and unburies his face from Nino’s knee as Nino scrambles to his feet, pausing his game and putting it down the nearby table before Nino walks the rest of the way out the living room, and he can barely make out the sound of Nino’s voice as Nino speaks into his video intercom, asking who the person outside his door is.  
  
“Delivery for Ninomiya-san,” the guy answers, loud enough that his voice rings throughout the apartment; he finds that he is smiling before he can stop himself when Nino replies, almost crossly, “I’m not expecting any delivery, are you sure you got the right address?”  
  
The delivery guy probably pauses to check his invoice. “Ah, yes, I think so, at least if you’re Ninomiya Kazunari-san of apartment 714 –“  
  
“Alright, fine,” Nino cuts in, “but would you please tell me what delivery it is and who is it from?”  
  
The delivery guy pauses again then, “Uh, it’s an electric guitar, Ninomiya-san. Yamaha Pacifica 812VL, 2015 model, color dark red,” the guy says, then, “the sender is, uh, I’m not sure if this is correct but the name that is written here is _Husband-san_ –“  
  
“What the –“  
  
“Are you going to receive it anyway, Ninomiya-san?”  
  
A beat. “Fine, come on up.”  
  
It took Nino about fifteen minutes to finish his business with the delivery guy, hauling the parcel box containing the guitar and has barely dragged it inside the apartment when the doorbell rings again.   
  
He turns to find Nino looking at him. “I’m not expecting anyone,” he tells Nino before Nino can ask him. Nino shakes his head and goes back out to check who it is.  
  
It turns out to be another delivery, the newest PS4 model with 10 new games. And again, it was sent by someone named ‘Husband-san’.  
  
When Nino come back inside, he has this look on his face that veers between amusement and something else, something that is a little intense, a little wild. He waits until Nino is done hauling the last of the parcel box, and is so ready for Nino when Nino throws himself into his arms, Nino’s mouth  hot and demanding when Nino catches his for a kiss.  
  
“You’re a bastard,” Nino mutters still mostly into his mouth, but his eyes is a little misty, his smile a little shaky. He raises his hand and pushes his fingers through Nino’s hair, holds Nino’s head steady as he thumbs at Nino’s cheek with his other hand.  
  
“Don’t call your future husband a bastard, that’s rude,” he comments but he is smiling back, pressing soft kisses against the corner of Nino’s mouth.   
  
Nino huffs and leans over to rest their foreheads together, closes his eyes and murmurs, “Who says you’re the husband anyway? Also, did you hear me say yes?”  
  
He grins and tilts Nino’s chin up, kissing Nino’s mouth softly. “You kind of already did the minute you ran back here and gave me a kiss so filthy. That’s more than a yes in my book, so, yeah,”  
  
Nino smacks him upside the head and kisses him again. The questions can wait later, for now, the kisses are enough.  
  
He and Nino together is enough.


	7. Verse 7

It’s still a little too early for bed, it’s just half past the hour of seven, afterall, but he doesn’t have the heart to wake Nino up when Nino is sleeping soundly like this. Half of Nino’s face is buried into the pillow, and the only visible part of Nino’s face in this position is the side of his temple, a bit of his eyebrow that is also partially hidden by the strands of stubborn hair that falls like curtain over Nino’s eyes.  
  
He is lying on his side, his chin propped up on his elbow as he watches Nino sleep, trying to resist the urge to run his fingers across Nino’s temple, the bridge of his nose, down to the corners of Nino’s lips, the beauty mark on Nino’s chin, because touching Nino means waking him and he doesn’t want that, not now, not when Nino looks so peaceful, so at ease, lying in bed and sleeping with him there.  
  
It’s because he takes it as a privilege, a gift, that Nino allows him this luxury, this rare moments of intimacy because Nino values his own alone time to allow other people in that space he creates for himself. He is the same, in some way, but he’s never had issues about personal space, about his friends and those close to him to invade that space he supposedly allots to himself only because, well, that’s just how it is and maybe because he doesn’t mind so long as he is sharing that space to those people he genuinely cares about, and vice versa. And it’s not a secret that Nino values his privacy to the extent that he prefers visiting his friends’ place rather than inviting his friends over to hang out. He is also sure that he is the only Arashi member who had been to Nino’s place much to the other three’s chagrin but they never dared question it.   
  
They are aware Nino treats him differently, afterall, and for that, he is glad. Immensely.  
  
He watches Nino some more, vaguely wishes he can turn the lights on so he can see Nino’s face clearly. Though Nino’s bedroom isn’t that dark because of the streaks of light pilfering through Nino’s window, the brightness coming from the streetlights outside, he wishes he can see more. It’s a little dim that he can’t make out the shape of Nino’s lips like this, that he has to squint and scoots a little closer to observe the way the side of Nino’s mouth curl as he sleeps.  
  
He reaches out and very carefully pushes the strands of hair covering Nino’s eyes, gaze wandering past Nino’s cheekbone to his jaw, breath catching at the sight of a dark mark blooming right beneath Nino’s chin. It’s not that visible now, but he bets it’ll be pretty obvious come morning, and his chest tightens at the memory of himself as he sucks that mark onto Nino’s skin, too occupied with the demands of his own body, and Nino’s too, to even care. Nino will probably give him hell for it come morning but he knows Nino will also forgive him. That’s how it always is for them, afterall.  
  
He doesn’t realize he is still stroking Nino’s cheek when Nino stirs and pops one eye open to squint at him, frowning prettily at him, still looking disoriented and sleepy. He is so beautiful that he finds himself scooting even closer, watching Nino’s face closely before leaning in to feel the way Nino’s eyelashes flutter against his cheek. Nino groans and jabs him on the chest but otherwise lets him, feels Nino melting into him as he folds his arm around Nino’s back.  
  
Nino hums sleepily, his breathe warm and familiar against the side of his neck as he rubs his palm across Nino’s bare back. He knows there are red, maybe purplish now, marks all over Nino’s back and thighs, too, because he made sure to mark Nino everytime Nino allows him, worshipping Nino’s body with his mouth and fingers, demanding more from Nino because he knows he’s the only one who can. It’s that privilege that he doesn’t mind having, a privilege he wouldn’t dare lose so someone else can enjoy it because just the thought of other people touching Nino like that is enough to drive him mad.   
  
“Still tired?” he hums into Nino’s hair, pressing two kisses to the top of Nino’s head before he is pulling away to squint at Nino. Nino curls his hand against his forearms, drawing him near.  
  
“And whose fault do you think that is?” Nino snaps but it lacked its supposed bite and he chuckles, can’t not, as he fingers the side of Nino’s mouth.   
  
“I wholeheartedly take the blame for that, so I apologize,” he says, coaxing Nino to unbury his face from the pillow, chuckling again when Nino grumbles, “ _Let me sleep already!_ ”  
  
He lets Nino, though he pulls him closer again. Nino’s legs end up slotted in between his own, just like how they slept the night before back in his apartment; it’s almost like a distant memory but a memory that is so clear that even now, he can clearly imagine it, the way Nino had blushed and blushed hearing his confessions.  
  
“Can I turn the lights on, Kazu?” he asks, knows that Nino is probably minutes away from falling asleep again. Nino grunts and doesn’t bother taking his arms off from being wrapped around his waist. “Please?”  
  
“Why?” Nino snaps, yet again.  
  
“Because it’s too dark in here and I can’t see your face,” he says, more like complains and feels more than hears Nino’s answering sigh. He suddenly has this urge to flood the place with lights so he can inspect each and every part of Nino’s body he’s left a mark on, find those places he wasn’t able to so he can mark them, too.  
  
“Fuck no, not that again,” Nino grumbles, quickly shifting and moving out from his hold to turn the other way. He watches Nino’s back, now bathe with just a bit shade of light and he suddenly remembers the one time he is with Nino at that beach in Okinawa, mesmerized at the sight of Nino, the backdrop of the setting sun making him look ethereal, beautiful.  
  
He suddenly wishes he is able to capture it on camera, because then he was too engrossed at watching Nino to even think about taking his gaze away from Nino.  
  
He scoots closer and wraps his arms around Nino, tugging him into him until Nino’s back is on his chest. His lips pressed against the side of Nino’s temple,  “What’s wrong ?” he asks, quiet and worried, “am I not allowed to want to look at your face whenever I want to?”  
  
Nino sighs again but he’s not moving away so he guesses it’s okay; Nino is okay with talking. “You have plenty of time to do that come morning, for now, we sleep. I’m tired, aren’t you tired?”  
  
“No,”  
  
Nino huffs but he presses closer, lets him folds his arms around Nino more firmly. “Well then good for you, Superman,” Nino says, a touché exasperated. “Have it your way, but let me sleep because I’m dead tired. You weren’t the one who had to spend the better part of the hour almost bent in half, so –“  
  
“I told you to lie on your back but you didn’t want to,” he returns, his lips curling into a pout. He tugs Nino again, for good measure.  
  
“We’re not going to talk about the things I decided upon with half a mind, okay? Besides, I didn’t hear you complaining so why the frowning pout now?”  
  
“I want to see you,” he insists, stubborn.  
  
“You see me everyday, what’s wrong with you?”  
  
“I don’t,” he says, burying his nose against Nino’s hair, the images of Nino back then is flooding the back of his eyelids before he can stop it. He wants to see it again so badly his chest constricts at the fact that he can’t see Nino’s face clearly now, that not even the fact that Nino is here, inside his arms, is enough to satisfy the craving.  
  
“And it’s not enough,” he follows, only vaguely aware that Nino might be pissed because he might not understand what he’s talking about. “You may be there but I don’t always see you, not clearly at least,”  
  
“Oh-chan, what the fuck is wrong with you –“  
  
He pulls Nino to him, the ache in his chest intensifies with every damn second that pass by, the images burn at the back of his eyelids like it’s been embedded there for the longest time. He wants to see it, wants to paint it, and god, the need is driving him crazy.  
  
“I want to see you, your face, clearly but even though you’re standing next to me, in front of me, it seems like I can’t,”  
  
“Oh –ch –“  
  
He buries his nose into Nino’s hair, breathes in Nino’s scent and coaxes Nino to turn around. Nino does without complaints and he is immediately cupping Nino’s cheek, his palm warm against Nino’s skin.  
  
“And it’s only when you have your back towards the setting sun that I can see you properly,” he finds himself murmuring against the side of Nino’s mouth, terrified for a second that there might come a time that he won’t be able to see Nino’s face clearly anymore, lips seeking Nino’s for a hard kiss before he pulls away. “It’s that time when the light shines all around you that I can see you clearly, the only other time that I care so little about the lights dancing around you because all I see is you,”  
  
“Satoshi –“  
  
“I want to see that again, Nino,” he says, mostly into Nino’s mouth, almost begging as he cups the back of Nino’s neck. “Please let me see you again,”  
  
Nino nods his head and kisses him back,  a touché desperate, nodding his consent.   
  
“Okay,” Nino agrees, and he figures Nino understands his desperation, kissing him quiet again. His pulse slows down, his heartbeat does too.   
  
“Tomorrow?” he asks, fingering the soft strands of hair round the back of Nino’s neck, basking on the familiar feel of Nino against him.   
  
Nino chuckles in response and nods his head, just to indulge him. “Fine,” Nino says, “but just this once,”  
  
He nods back, already planning everything in his head as Nino settles closer, kisses his mouth, his chin, his cheek.  
  
“Thank you, Nino,”  
  
Nino nods and kisses him quiet again. “Anything for you, Oh-chan,”   
  
He smiles and holds Nino, holds him holds him holds him.


	8. Verse 8

He wakes to the feel of someone’s thumb tracing circles across his cheek, soft and barely-there touches that makes him want to lean in further to the touch, savor the moment before it disappears. He doesn’t need to open his eyes to know that it is Nino, Nino’s fingers touching him, the warmth of Nino’s touch is as familiar as the warm press of something soft against the side of his temple.

He doesn’t bother opening his eyes because he is afraid Nino will pull away, especially because Nino is so easily embarrassed about showing his affections; it’s okay if it’s him who moves first, if it’s him who’s doing the touching and the asking, because Nino is used to it. Though it’s not like Nino's never done it, because he does, but only when Nino thinks he’s asleep and therefore couldn’t hear the words Nino likes to say so himself.

“I don’t know who gave you the idea that you can tame me, make me do things you like because that’s the kind of thing I hate the most,” Nino complains under his breath, words spoken softly against the skin of his temple; Nino is alternating between running his fingertips across the line of his jaw and thumbing the side of his mouth. “I hate it and I swore to myself that that’s never gonna happen – I am myself and I will only do what I think is right, whatever pleases me but,” Nino pauses here, heaves a sigh so deep that it makes things in his chest tight.

“but then you fucking came along and messed everything up,” Nino continues, breath hitching just the slightest bit and he wonders if it’s because Nino hates him for it, for everything that is happening in Nino’s life because of him, but then Nino shifts and ducks down to press their lips together, soft and chaste, Nino’s fingers tender against his jaw.

“Now I can’t fucking imagine being without you,” Nino says afterwards, and his heart does that stupid dance inside his chest, rejoicing like a lunatic, “and it’s all your fucking fault,” Nino follows, fingers curling against the collar of his shirt, before Nino’s face follows, pressing insistently against the dip of his neck.

He’s not sure yet if it’s ideal to wake now, let Nino know he heard everything, but then Nino shifts and something damp and warm flows against the skin of his throat. His chest constricts painfully yet again, and he’s frozen in place, feeling the little shake and trembles of Nino’s body almost atop him.

He remembers the last time Nino’s like this, but that was years ago and he was nothing but an asshole, hurting Nino without knowing it, but he was sure he did his best to be a better man for Nino, had promised Nino that he’d do everything to make things right for them, be the person Nino would be proud enough to have.

“And you know what they say that we don’t really choose who we fall in love with?” Nino is speaking again, so he guesses he should just keep his mouth shut and pretend he’s still asleep, if only so Nino won’t stop talking. “I guess it’s true because, why not, when there are a lot of people out there – amazing people, to be exact -  for me to choose from and then I ended up falling in love with you? It’s really frustrating sometimes, especially when you’re being a jerk but then I will look at you and find you looking at me, too, and then I’ll realize my heart  is doing that backflipping-thing inside my chest again, that  fuck-Ohchan-is-looking-at-me dance and I’ll suddenly forget the reasons why loving you is a bad idea. It’s stupid, I know, and that even though I know we’re not supposed to be together, I still want us to be and I’ll fight anyone who will say otherwise, because my heart wants to love you and that’s that. The world could go fuck itself, I don’t care so long as you’re there when I look around for you, that it doesn’t matter whether we can’t be together outside of this four walls because I know who you belong to, you know who I belong to and it’s enough,”

A beat, then, “and you can open your eyes now because I know you’ve been awake and listening, you jerk,”

Oh. “Oh,”

“You think I didn’t know?” Nino asks, his voice so small that he finds himself reaching around for Nino, tugging Nino so close, tight and tighter still until there doesn’t seem to be even a tiny inch distance between them. He presses his mouth against Nino’s hair, soft and grateful as he hold Nino close.

“I – K-Kazu –“

“And you know what’s weird?” Nino says, as if he’s resigned himself to this, to his thoughts being heard so he simply holds Nino and nods his head in answer.  
 “Sometimes… sometimes I realized I love you so fucking much that it hurts a lot,” Nino says, the hitch on his breath returning, and he hugs Nino tighter in return. “I realize I love you so much and it hurts a lot, Oh-chan… why does it hurt when it also feels like it’s the only thing keeping me alive?”

He nods his head and pulls just a bit away so he can grasp Nino’s jaw, tilting Nino’s face up. “You know what they say about ‘giving your heart to someone means you’re not only giving them power to love you but also to hurt you’? I think that’s the same thing,” he says, leaning down to kiss the corners of Nino’s mouth. “But I won’t hurt you, never again, I promise. I’ll take care of your heart this time, Kazu, I promise you that,”

It feels like a whole lifetime before Nino nods his head and when he does, he whispers,

“I believe you,” Nino says and he found a smile for Nino as he catches Nino’s lips into a kiss.


	9. Verse 9

“Don’t you ever get tired?” Jun asks, possibly out of curiosity more than anything else, then pauses when Nino yells something at Aiba. He simply hums, not really listening because his attention is on Nino and Nino alone, watching the way Nino is going through the choreography again with Aiba, because Nino is kind-hearted like that.   
  
He knows it because despite Nino’s tendency to bitch, despite his biting remarks and snarky comments that sometimes hurts, Nino loves them to a fault; knows that Nino is willing to go down on his knees if he has to, to apologize on their place if he thinks he needs to.  
  
“Well, it’s been months,” Jun follows through as if he hadn’t been interrupted, catching his attention by throwing a towel over his head. “And I know you’ve been trying to get his approval, make him say yes but it’s not working, is it?”  
  
He tilts his head and tries to come up with something clever to say but he can’t find any. Jun doesn’t even need to elaborate on what he is saying because he knows perfectly well what Jun is talking about.  
  
“I’ve hurt him,” he breathes the words carefully without taking his gaze off of Nino. “It’s expected that he’ll think a hundred times before he trusts me fully again,”  
  
“I’m not sure that’s the reason, though,” Jun returns and he glances to his right to find Jun taking a sip from his bottle. The liquid is pink and it sloshes around when Jun puts it down the floor between them. “Because if that’s the case, I don’t think he’ll go straight into bed with you if he thinks you’re not worth the chance he’s willingly given you,”  
  
He shrugs and takes his gaze back to where Nino and Aiba are still going at it, taking note at the way Nino’s shirt is clinging to his body like second skin. He can feel the familiar rush of heat at the sight of Nino’s damp skin, and willing himself not to get hard at the memory of his own fingers caressing Nino’s pale skin in the dark.  
  
“It’s hard to explain it but I think Nino is trying to be careful,” he says, grabbing his own water bottle and uncapping it, raising it up to his lips and taking a huge gulp if only to swallow down his growing need for Nino. “And I totally understand it, I really do,”  
  
“You’re saying that but it’s clear that it’s hurting you whenever he tells you NO,”  
  
That maybe true, but. “I’ll live,” he returns, finding a smile for Jun despite the fact that his chest feels a little constricted that makes even the simple thing as breathing difficult. “As long as he’s allowing me into his space the way I thought I’d never be allowed to again, as long as he is giving me the chance to show him that this time, I’m staying. It doesn’t matter how many times he says NO, it really doesn’t, as long as he lets me stay whenever I want to,”  
  
Jun doesn’t answer though he knows for sure that the question was asked not because Jun wanted answers for himself but because the younger man simply wants to make sure that everything is okay between him and Nino despite the fact that even now, months after they got back together, Nino still refuses for them to move in together.  
  
He do understand where Nino is coming from but to be honest, it pains him sometimes to know that the reason Nino won’t agree is because Nino is still afraid they won’t make it through. That despite everything they’ve promised each other the night they got back together, something might go wrong and it might be the end of them.  
  
Well, he can’t really blame Nino and the least he can do now is to show the younger man that he intends to stay forever this time, that there’s nowhere he’d rather be but to be with Nino, right next to Nino for as long as Nino allows him to.  
  
“But what if he never says yes?” Jun asks, breaking his focus yet again. He smiles if only to cover the way he is temporarily terrified with the possibility, blood pounding through his ears and pulling himself upright when Nino glances towards his direction, gestures for him to come forward with an easy, though obviously tired smile.   
  
“Then he won’t,” he answers, “but that doesn’t mean I’m going to stop trying, because I _won’t,_ ”   
  
+++  
  
He steps right into Nino’s space without missing a beat, carefully holding Nino’s gaze as Nino’s eyes tracks his movements.  
  
“Oh-chan,”  
  
He traces the skin beneath Nino’s eyes softly, carefully, staring into Nino’s eyes and feeling like he can get lost to them forever just like this. Their bodies are pressed together that not even air can pass through in between them, can feel the growing heat and need as Nino dutifully stays still without breaking their gazes.  
  
This close, he can see the way Nino’s lips quiver with need, the raw intensity of their combined desires is making the hair at the back of his neck stand on end, the electricity thrumming across their skins is like liquid fire burning them from deep within, all ready to be consumed with just the slightest provocation but neither of them wants to be the first to cross the distance between them, to be the first to close his eyes and parts his lips as surrender.  
  
He wants to but not now, not yet, at least.  
  
“Tell me what I have to do and I’ll do it,” he tells Nino, his words mostly spoken against Nino’s lips, their mouths almost touching but not quite. Nino’s body is trembling just the tiniest bit and he can feel the way Nino’s breath stutters when he folds his arm around Nino’s back to hold him steady. “What I should do to earn all your trust –“  
  
“You already have it,” Nino cuts him off and he swears his breath catches at the tone of Nino’s voice, at the wild, almost fierce look on Nino’s face when he opened his mouth to talk. “Since that night and every day thereafter, Oh-chan,”  
  
He shakes his head and leans in forward to press their foreheads together, and this close, he can feel the way Nino’s chest expands with his every breath.   
  
“Then why won’t you let me stay when I –“  
  
Nino is the one shaking his head this time. “I never said that,” Nino tells him, his voice sounded as miserable as the look on his face is. “It’s not like –“  
  
“I told you I want to stay with you and you know what it means,” he says, fingering the side of Nino’s jaw, soft and tender. “You know what it means but you always find a way to evade the question, you always find a way to refuse me when I –“  
  
“It’s not that I’m refusing you, it’s just that –“  
  
“You don’t trust me,” he whispers, and he knows he sounds as miserable as well, closing his eyes as he worms his fingers round the back of Nino’s neck. “You still don’t trust me enough to want to share that space with me again –“  
  
“Oh-chan, be reasonable,”  
  
“I love you, you know?” he breathes, leaning down to press his a soft kiss against the corner of Nino’s mouth, to his jaw, to the mole on his chin.   
  
“I know that,” Nino answers, his tone hoarse and raspy that it makes him want to kiss Nino right this second. “God, do you even know what you’re doing to me? Y-You – you’re just everything to me, Oh-chan… everything, okay? And I just, god, I’m scared of losing you again so this is me being careful, alright? Please please please try to understand that I’m –“  
  
“I do understand, but sometimes it’s just so hard when we’re apart and all I want is to touch you but I can’t because you’re not there when I turn around to find you,” he bites back, all the misery he felt the past year he and Nino aren’t together is slowly coming back to haunt him.  
  
“Satoshi –“  
  
“But if this is what you want then okay,” he cuts in, taking Nino’s face in between his hands and pressing his mouth against Nino’s lips. “But just, _god,_ tell me you’re willing to try it with me again, to try living together again because there’s nothing I want more than to sleep with you in my arms, and to wake up every morning with you still in it,”  
  
“I want that too, believe me, Oh-chan –“  
  
He nods and kisses Nino hard this time, coaxing Nino’s mouth open and shoving his tongue inside, curling it against Nino’s own; Nino’s kisses is as desperate as his own is, backing Nino against the stall’s wall and kissing him back with all the desperation that he himself also feels.  
  
“I’m _so_ in love with you,” he whispers into Nino’s mouth when they pull apart, fingering the side of Nino’s neck, his ears, his chin; "And you know I meant every word, Kazu," he tells Nino, apropos of nothing, not bothering hiding the way his voice is shaking, wishing he has the power to erase Nino’s fears just by being here.   
  
Nino nods, eyes still closed but doesn’t say anything, but he does lean in to his touch when he caresses Nino’s cheek, moving his hand behind Nino’s head to keep him in place as he places kisses over Nino’s closed eyelids.  
  
“There’s no one else but you, no one, you hear me?” he says, his fingers careful on their grip around the back of Nino's neck. "because it is only you in my eyes, always will and always have been; my sight is blurry when I couldn’t see you, and my world just stops from spinning whenever you’re not around,"  
  
“Satoshi –“  
  
He doesn’t let Nino finish and just goes in for another kiss, forgetting the world for now as he holds Nino close.


	10. Verse 10

They left the Jimusho in silence though it is obvious that something did change after their, err, conversation inside the shower room earlier. Nino drove in silence while keeping their hands twined, and it’s the gesture, the way Nino’s fingers would occasionally squeezed his, was what made it so intimate, like Nino was saying something through touch alone.  
  
He would have said something then if only to break the silence but he knew better than to do that when they’re fine like this.   
  
Nino led him inside Nino’s apartment, locking the door behind them but not before kissing him once, twice, right there by the door. Even Nino’s kisses are soft, almost chaste, Nino’s fingers gentle on his face.   
  
“Nino –“  
  
Nino brushes an affectionate finger across his cheek, leans forward to press two soft kisses over his eyelids before taking his hand again. Nino is still quiet but he doesn’t mind it, not at all, given the fact that after months of being back together, Nino seemed more relaxed now, more at ease being around him now than he was before.  
  
“Coffee, Oh-chan?” Nino asks with a little smile that makes his breath catch. He finds that he can’t even manage a proper reply so he instead reaches up to curl his fingers around Nino’s wrist and tugging Nino down onto his lap, one arm branding around Nino’s waist reflexively to steady him.  
  
“Don’t go,” he murmurs into Nino’s hair, the side of Nino’s temple, his chest constricting in a way that is so similar to that time Nino said goodbye. He leans back onto the couch and takes Nino with him, moves his hand up to cradle the back of Nino’s head gently before he tugs Nino’s face down, resting their foreheads together as he breathes Nino in. “Don’t, Nino,”  
  
“I’m just going to –“ he doesn’t give Nino the chance to say anything as he’s catching Nino’s mouth into a kiss, hot and desperate as he can manage it. He kisses Nino again and again, if only to erase that awful feeling throbbing away in his chest.  
  
+++  
  
They’re in bed, Nino on top of him, rolling his hips minutely, their gazes locked. His hands are on Nino’s hips, firm and yet careful, gasping for breath every goddamn time he feels himself slide in deeper into Nino’s body.   
  
It’s perfect like this, being buried inside Nino’s body as Nino alternates between leaning down to catch his lips into a kiss and driving him crazy by going slow. But even then, he doesn’t do anything to rush Nino, simply gritting his teeth when it’s getting frustratingly hard not to buck back into Nino, hurry things along, because this time is for Nino. His fingers claw at the sheets beneath him, teeth biting into his lower lip and groaning, low and long, as Nino stills for a moment to probably get his bearings, before he’s at it again, rolling his hips in slow, deliberate motions, clenching and unclenching around him like a goddamn tease.  
  
But it’s not a tease as much as it is a plea, because he can see it in Nino’s eyes. Right now, despite the lack of words, Nino is saying so many things – _I’m yours, take me… forever, promise me_ – even without saying them out loud. There’s no need – things have never been as clear as they are now.  
  
Nino loves him so, the same way he loves Nino and he knows it, could see it clearly in the way Nino’s eyes are trained on him, on the way Nino slides a finger past his lips, on the way Nino takes him in, all the way in, without breaking their connection. No words are needed, not now, at least.  
  
“Satoshi –“ Nino gasps, his name spills out of Nino’s mouth like a breathless plea. He finds himself groaning in response, his body’s moving on its own before he could stop himself. He is pulling himself upright, arms worming around Nino, raising his head as Nino is ducking down to meet him halfway. They are kissing within seconds, tongues tangling together, moaning into Nino’s mouth at the feel of Nino clenching around him, so perfect, so Nino.  
  
When they pull apart, he is immediately worming a hand around the back of Nino’s head, butting their foreheads together as he watches Nino watch him. Nino’s eyes are so so bright, his chin quivering and for one insane moment, he thinks he saw something passed through Nino’s eyes, regret and something else, and his chest throbs at the remembered pain before he is able to swallow it down.  
  
“You let me walk away,” Nino says, out of the blue, so unexpected that his chest swells at the sound of Nino’s voce when he said it – regret, pain, and something he can’t quite put his fingers on. “Why did you let me walk away, Oh-chan?”  
  
He finds that he can only shake his head then, his verbal ability temporarily left him as he cradles Nino close to him, wishes he can do more than cling unto Nino, hold him as long Nino lets him. He keeps shaking his head, at least until his mind is clear enough to answer Nino.  
  
“I had to,” he says, cupping Nino’s cheek, kissing Nino’s tears away. “I had to but that didn’t mean I was going to let you walk away forever. I was just behind you, Nino, trailing after you, letting you lead the way because it’s what you needed at the time, it’s what we both needed then,” he says, leaning up to kiss Nino full on the mouth, tasting bitterness and regret. He tries chasing it away, tries putting everything he has in the next kiss he gives Nino.  
  
“A year, Satoshi,” Nino pauses here, voice trembling around the edges and he has to kiss Nino again, has to, can’t not, pulling Nino tight against him. “You let me hurt us, and we suffered a whole year because of it,” Nino adds, voice still shaking, trembling just like the rest of him.   
“You let me believe that’s the end,” says Nino, fingers gripping his shoulders tight enough to hurt but he lets Nino, lets him lets him. “You let me believe you don’t love me anymore,”  
  
He shakes his head again, pressing his fingers against the base of Nino’s skull, soft and tender, just letting Nino feel he’s there.  
  
“And I’d do it again in a heartbeat if it means I’ll have you forever,” he tells Nino, and now, more than ever, he wants Nino to understand that he’s not going anywhere. Not without Nino. Never.   
  
“But how did you know it’s still the same?” Nino asks, something fierce in his voice, in his eyes. “How did you know you still love me the same way?”  
  
He curls his palm against the lovely curve of Nino’s neck, presses a kiss against the corners of Nino’s mouth.  
  
“Because I didn’t just fell in love with you, Nino,” he tells Nino, fingers warm and tender against Nino’s neck. He holds Nino close, closer than he’d ever held Nino before that it’s almost suffocating but he doesn’t care.  “I walked into love with you, with my eyes wide open, choosing to take every step along the way. I do believe in fate and destiny, but I also believe we are only fated to do the things that we’d choose anyway,” he pauses here, meeting Nino’s eyes straight on, stroking Nino’s cheek.  
  
“And because I’d choose you, Nino; in a hundred lifetimes, in a hundred worlds, in any version of reality, I’d find you and I’d choose you, and that’s that. It doesn’t matter how many times you walk away from me, it doesn’t matter how many times I’ll allow you to. Because in the end, I will find you and I’ll make you mine, no questions asked,”  
  
Nino stays quiet for all of two seconds before Nino is blinking rapidly, mouth parted slightly as Nino murmurs his name, hoarse and needy. He is so ready for Nino when Nino moves, his mouth parted open in a gasp when Nino’s mouth found his.


	11. Verse 11

He rubs at his tired eyes, putting his DS down after hitting the pause button, feeling vaguely annoyed for playing the same freaking level during the past three hours without getting into the next one and he knows what exactly is the problem.  
  
He is fucking distracted. He can't game properly because all he thinks about is how he woke up the second time this morning missing the warmth he fell asleep with the night before. His body is aching in all the places that count, blushing at the memories of the previous night and grumbling curses under his breath as he does so.  
  
Everything about the night before keeps on replaying in his head like his mind is nothing but a freaking video recorder, every little thing, every last bits of conversation repeating itself like a freaking mantra that he can hardly focus.   
  
And it's all Ohno's fault.  
  
It's probably a lot better if he has work scheduled today, because then at least he won't have to think about Ohno and how Ohno drove him to tears the night before, how he'd been kissed almost senseless this morning before Ohno left for work.  
  
He grumbles, lying back onto the couch with a hearty thump, throwing an arm over his eyes if only so he won't have to see how huge and empty  his apartment seemed like when Ohno isn't around. But he has a choice, a chance to change that but he can't bring himself to believe in it fully just yet, not because he doesn't trust Ohno enough but mostly because he doesn't trust himself not to screw up again.  
  
 _You don't trust me_ , Ohno had told him, pain evident in the tone of Ohno's voice, in the miserable curl of Ohno's mouth. _You still don't trust me enough to want to share that space with me again_ , Ohno had said and god, he's not sure how he's going to make Ohno understand that he is doing this for the older man, for them, because the last thing he would want is to mess things up when they've just gotten back together.   
  
And he's not sure if it is enough, if Ohno believed him when he told the older man that this is just him being careful because he simply doesn't want to lose Ohno again. He's been there before and the pain almost drove him insane, and so he plans on doing everything he can so he won't have to go there again. That is why he wants to take his time, he wants the both of them to be both ready for it when they decided they want to live together again.  
  
The trouble now, though, is this : he wants Ohno here, right now, so much it makes him sick.  
  
It hasn't even been a day and he misses the older man already - the warmth of his body close to his, the possessiveness of his touch, the sounds of his voice, the feeling of being owned, captured when Ohno gazes at him from wherever Ohno is. It doesn't matter how far apart they are from each other, Ohno always makes him feel like he belongs to the older man and to the older man alone despite the distance separating them, the way all blood rush south when he catches Ohno's gaze - dark, intent and wanting - on him, that Ohno simply needs to call his name for everything to start all over again.  
  
He has been contemplating between sending a text or calling the older man but he held himself since he knows Ohno must still be in the middle of filming and he doesn't want to cause any trouble. He's sure Ohno's phone must be with his manager and he doesn't want to impose anything, most especially because he's certain Ohno's manager won't even hesitate on passing Ohno's phone to his charge if he realizes who's calling. And he is also pretty sure Ohno's not going to think twice excusing himself even while he's in the middle of a shoot just to ask him what is wrong.  
  
Still, it doesn't make it any less painful to feel this way - this overwhelming desire to hear Ohno's voice right now, to see his face, hear him say his name in that wonderful, wonderful way that makes his heartbeat accelerate.   
  
"I swear to god, one of these days I am going to -" he says out loud, or at least starts to when his phone starts to vibrate, the sound of it so distractingly loud he almost slides down the couch in surprise. He reaches over, squints at the screen for all of two seconds before he is scrambling to unlock it.  
  
It is Ohno.   
  
"What the fuck do you want now?" he hisses, if only to cover up the way his voice is quivering and his fingers trembling on their grip around his phone. A beat, then two, before Ohno hollows out a husky laugh from the other that just about melt his annoyance away, at least until Ohno murmurs,   
  
"Just calling to say hi," the older man says around a chuckle and god, he wants Ohno right here, right now and if he doesn't do something to stop himself from saying it, he'll scream. "and to say that I miss you so much, Nino,"  
  
He grumbles, his annoyance dissipating faster than the blush covering his face and he wishes he doesn't have to look and act like a teenage girl talking to her crush, although it already feels like it. God, he's so hopeless.  
  
"Don't tell me you miss me," he grumbles instead, because he doesn't trust himself enough yet not to say the cheesiest of words when he feels like this, when Ohno's absence is enough to drive him batshit crazy. "Words don't mean anything if you're not going to do anything about it,"   
  
"Tell me you're outside and you need to see me," he says, kicking Ohno's imaginary legs, the usual thing he does when they're on the couch, lying side by side with Ohno's arms fling around his middle. "because saying you miss me means nothing if you're not going to be here anyway,"  
  
It's unfair, he knows that it is, but he's way past thinking about being fair when everything about this is Ohno's fault. Of course it is, how can't it not be when this is all Ohno's doing... why he's so fucking in love with Ohno it's borderline crazy, the reason why right now, he wants to give everything Ohno wants, move in with him if that's what's going to bring Ohno here now.  
  
Another beat that sure feels longer than the last before Ohno hums something like his name coupled with a husky,   
  
"Then open the door and let me in,"  
  
He's up on his feet and off the couch in seconds.  
  
  
+++  
  
Ohno's hands alternate between rubbing circles down the small of his back and cupping his cheeks, mouth otherwise occupied with kissing and sucking light marks along the line of his jaw. Ohno won't let go despite his few attempts at wriggling out of Ohno's hold, Ohno backing him against the door and kissing him hard again.  
  
He kisses back because why not? This is what he wants, anyway, been craving for this only an hour after Ohno left and he's not that stupid to deny himself this when Ohno is already here to satiate that hunger - his hunger for the older man that no one will and can satisfy besides Ohno. He clings unto Ohno's shoulders, kisses Ohno back almost desperately, legs tangled around Ohno's own. It's incredibly warm and familiar and perfect and god, how is it even possible for him to not want to have this every fucking day? Ohno's practically begged him for it, for them to move in together again and what did he do?   
  
He refused. Yes, because he's an idiot.  
  
"Yes," he whimpers into Ohno's mouth, fingers tight on Ohno's hair, "Yes, Oh-chan -"  
  
Ohno pulls away for a second, just enough to look him in the eye. Ohno looks confused and for a moment, he is annoyed but then catches himself halfway. Of course, Ohno doesn't know what he's talking about, silly him.  
  
"I agree," he says, leaning up for another kiss, long and slow that when they pull apart again they are both breathing hard. "Let's move in together because _this_ -" he gestures to himself, sheepish and flushing, "- this _'I'm being careful bullshit'_ is nothing but nonsense. I want to be with you, too, I want to wake up next to you every morning and there's nothing I want more than to be inside your arms every waking hour of my life, too,"  
  
Ohno's face lights up like a kid on Christmas morning and right then and there, he knows he made the right decision. "Nino -" Ohno says his name, and he sounded amazed, so happy, and maybe because he is. Ohno touches his face, soft and tender and careful, looks at him as if he feels so lucky, like Ohno is still crazy for him.  
  
And maybe he is too, because then he himself is smiling, reaching up to slide a tender thumb across Ohno's jaw, meeting Ohno's gaze and knows that everything's going to be fine because they are together.  
  
He's just as crazy about Ohno, afterall.  
  



	12. Verse 12

"Are you sure about this?"  
  
He doesn't bother turning round to acknowledge the person, but he does shrugs his shoulders in answer.   
  
"Well, I don't think there's no way to take it back now, especially when the movers are already here and his stuffs are being brought in -"  
  
"You know that's not what I was asking,"  
  
He does turn this time and offers Jun a smile. "I know, J," he says, squeezing Jun's forearm. They are both leaning against the door of his bedroom, watching the moving guys haul in Ohno's stuffs one after the other. Ohno himself is not here (they don't want to raise suspicions so even the boxes containing Ohno's stuffs has Nino's name on  them), he called twenty minutes after the moving guys arrived to inform Nino that his stuffs are on their way, that silly, silly man.  
  
"So you're really, _really_ sure about this?"  
  
He nods. "We're going to try it again, both of us, and this time, we promised each other that we're not going to screw up," he says, meeting his friend's wary gaze. Well he can't really blame Jun for being like this, for trying to put some sense into his head when it seems like he hasn't thought this through since Jun was there, watching him suffer the entire time he and Ohno were apart.   
  
"Oh, but you know, trying is completely different from the real thing and I -" Jun pauses here, and shakes his head. "I just don't want to see either of you go through the same thing all over again, Nino. It's - it's too painful to watch and honestly, I think if it's going to happen the second time around, you two won't be strong enough to handle it,"  
  
"I agree," he says, taking his gaze somewhere else if only so he won't have to see the shadow of doubt marring the edges of Jun's mouth. Of course it will be hard to convince his friends that this is the life he and Ohno has chosen, the life they both want to lead, now and for always. "I am terrified, too, you know?" he adds, "But it's this or live a life full of regrets. And I can't do that, not now, not after that year we spent apart, miserable and suffering just because I assumed he didn't love me anymore,"  
  
"Can't help it, you were both extremely stupid," Jun returns, but he sounded anything but fond.  
  
He nods his head in agreement and offers Jun another indulgent, if not an entirely grateful smile.   
  
"So true," he says, taking his gaze back to the boxes that now litter his once clean living room floor. "But we were given a second chance to make things right, to be happy with each other the second time around so I'm taking it," he says, and he knows he'll probably regret saying such mushy stuffs in front of Jun, not when he is completely sober but to hell with it. He loves Ohno so much that no amount of embarrassment is going to make him change his mind about this, about his decision. Then, like an afterthought, "He's my life, J, so I don't think there's no other way to change how this was gonna go. I knew then that I could never live without him, I just can't, J, and it was just a matter of time before we end up where we started. It's him, it's always been him, then and now, always,"  
  
Jun looks at him, stunned for a second longer before he reaches back and squeezes him on the shoulder.  
  
"I sure hope you're right, Nino,"  
  
He tilts his head and smiles but he doesn't answer. He knows he is right; he and Ohno will do everything to prove it.  
  
+++  
  
It's over a week since Ohno moved back in but he still can't bring himself to believe it fully. It's so surreal, waking up every morning to another person's warmth clinging onto him, to another person's scent he grew familiar with years and years before.   
  
It's a Friday, and a rarity that they both have the whole day free. They slept in just because they could, Ohno waking up before him and cooking him breakfast. It's so romantic that he was left giggling all throughout breakfast, because Ohno chose to be extra caring by feeding him spoonfuls after spoonfuls of his chahan.  
  
It's a little over eleven and he is just lounging on the sofa with his DS but he's not actually playing. He is just watching Ohno, who is then currently lounging on the carpeted floor, playing with his remote controlled cars.  
  
"Anything you want to say to me, just holler and I'll join you there in the couch, Ninomiya-san," Ohno says, and goodness gracious, he doesn't know when Ohno has acquired another eye in the back of his head. It's so creepy. "No need to burn a hole in my skull or something,"  
  
He snorts at the same time he pulls his legs up, letting his DS fall to the couch with a quiet thump.   
  
"Who says I was looking at you?" he bites back, though it sure lacks the usual bite and he is pretty certain his face is as red as a ripe tomato.   
  
"Are you looking at my butt, then?" Ohno returns, still not bothering turning round to look at him. It's actually pretty frustrating.   
  
"No," he answers, eyeing the said butt contemplatively. "Who wants to look at your butt anyway,"  
  
Ohno shrugs. "Everybody wants to look at my butt," Ohno says, like he means it. "and touch it too, if they could get away with it,"  
  
"Are you trying to pick a fight, Ohno Satoshi?" he bites out, his brows shooting up his hairline. His jealousy, though it seldom come out, is something he's still couldn't be man enough to admit. But it's there, along with everything else, things he should be used to upon falling in love with the most gorgeous man that ever walked the earth.  
  
(Okay, maybe not the most gorgeous but he will surely fight anyone who will say otherwise. He's biased, so sue him.)  
  
Ohno does turn this time around, offering him a small smile and a wink. " - course not," Ohno says and slowly gets up from where he's been camping at for the last half hour, ditching his remote controlled cars in favor of sauntering towards the couch.   
  
"Then what was that you were saying about -" he says, or at least starts to but Ohno's mouth is quickly there to swallow everything he is about to spout next. Ohno's hand worms to the back of his neck, warm and familiar, his mouth moves against his in a soft, almost chaste kiss.  
  
When Ohno pulls back just far enough to look him in the eye, he smiles. He can't help it, he feels love-struck, lucky and so alive as Ohno stands there, almost bent in half as they're face to face, fingering the corners of his lips in that tender, almost heartbeat-accelerating way of his.  
  
"I don't want anyone's hands touching my butt aside from yours, Nino," Ohno tells him matter-of-factly, and he giggles, can't not, biting his tongue a little too late as Ohno presses another kiss into the corners of his mouth. "You can touch my butt anytime you want, feel free to do it, I swear,"  
  
"You're so stupid," he tells Ohno, but he is smiling so it really doesn't count. Ohno is smiling, too, and he guesses this is them being stupid together, and it feels wonderfully nice.  
  
When Ohno presses another one, this time to his lips, he is so ready for Ohno, fingers tangling through his hair, his mouth parted with a gasp.


	13. Verse 13

It's been more than two hours since he last saw Ohno, and frankly, he's not sure whether to be worried or get pissed that he'd been trying to call Ohno for the last half hour but his calls won't get through.

All his calls are either going straight to voice mails and on those rare times one of his calls had gone through, it was immediately got cancelled after only two rings.

So it's either Ohno is really busy, or he is really, really pissed at him that Ohno couldn't even bear to hear his voice.

Though he's not at all sure this is the case because Ohno rarely gets upset, especially since they've just gotten back together,  but with the fact that Ohno had walked out the minute he saw him talking to Masami and her manager, it's not that hard to figure out.

"J, did you manage to find Kaori-san?" he asks Jun the minute Jun says hello, not bothering returning the greeting as he walks the rest of the way to his car. "I swear to god, that charge-manager combi is the worst," he whines before Jun can get one more word out, climbing into the driver's seat after he tugs the door open. "When his charge goes missing, the manager goes missing, too, and I swear - _what_?" he pauses, then, "Oh," when Jun asks him (more like yells) to shut the fuck up for a second so he can tell him that he just talked to Kaori-san and the older man said he'd just dropped Leader home because the older man said he is not feeling well.

"Jesus, do you really need to yell - fine! Alright, I'm going there now, thanks for your help!" he tells Jun without pausing, then hanging up immediately before Jun can shout at him some more.

He throws his phone into the passenger's seat and turns to start the ignition, muttering, "The things I do for you, Ohno Satoshi," under his breath.

+++

He steps into the apartment quietly, only to be greeted by the familiar sounds of his solo, Niji, being played on his piano.

He doesn't linger in the door the way he supposed he should and just goes straight inside once he has removed his shoes and has slipped on his house slippers. Ohno's are not there anymore so it is most likely that Ohno is the one playing instead of a ghost who probably likes his solo song too much.

He goes past the living room to the second bedroom (the one they've converted into a studio) and he stops to stand by the door, leaning against it and taking in the sight of Ohno's slouch back facing him, of Ohno's fingers working awkwardly against his piano keys.

He doesn't say anything and just opted on watching the muscles on Ohno's back shift with every movement, the way Ohno's shoulders sway as his fingers touch each piano keys delicately as if they're made of vulnerable glass.

When Ohno's fingers stop and the sounds do, too, he straightens up and waits until Ohno swings the stool around, finding him and locating his gaze in one try.

"I'm home," he mouths, quietly even though he's sure Ohno can't hear him, then gasps when Ohno nods and murmurs, "Welcome home," in return.

He doesn't leave the spot he's still standing at despite the urge, crosses his arms over his chest as his gaze sweeps over Ohno, quietly checking if he's still the same man who left him hours before. Maybe aside from the prominent frown marring Ohno's brows, he still looks fairly the same.

"Care to tell me why you ran off and left?" he asks, raising his voice just the slightest bit to make sure Ohno can hear him. Ohno shrugs and lowers his gaze, and god, his panic surges up his chest before he can even stop it.

The urge to run towards Ohno is so strong he has to bite down on his tongue to keep himself from doing that, wanting nothing but to satisfy his craving to be close to the older man, to take Ohno's face in between his hands and kiss Ohno's lips.

He doesn't, he can't, not now, not yet.

His voice is going to shake the next time he talks again so he does his best to swallow past the lump that has formed in his throat. When he's sure that he can speak again without shaking, he does so with his fingernails digging tightly into his skin.

"Y-You promised we'll make it through, Oh-chan," he says, and he is honestly scared he will bawl his eyes out the moment Ohno meets his. " _Don't_ do this to me, please," he follows and then the next thing he realizes is Ohno leaving the stool so quickly and crossing the distance between them so fast he barely has time to follow Ohno's movements until Ohno is standing in front of him, Ohno's face not even a breath away from his, and Ohno's fingers tender on his cheek.

"I'm sorry," Ohno breathes into his skin, eyes closing on their own as Ohno wasted no time in leaning into him and pressing their mouths together. He realizes he is trembling when Ohno's hands found his, gasps escaping the back of his throat, Ohno's tongue quickly muffling it.

"I'm sorry, _I'm sorry_ ," Ohno chants, planting soft kisses over his eyes, his jaw, the tips of his nose, to the corners of his mouth. Ohno keeps kissing him, holding him and he realized he's not the only one trembling when his arms go around Ohno's neck.

Ohno is shaking, too.

+++

"Tell me what happened," he asks Ohno when they're both calm enough to tackle the issue once more, holding onto Ohno as Ohno does the same. They're in the couch, limbs thrown together in a way that is almost suffocating. But it's comfortable, to be honest, with his face buried into the dip of Ohno's neck, and Ohno's face mashed into his hair.

A beat that became two before Ohno hums his answer. "I - I saw you with Nagasawa-san earlier and I -"

He is shaking his head before he can even stop himself. "No no no," he cuts in, unburying his face from Ohno's neck and tugging Ohno's face down for a kiss. He pulls away just far enough to say, "Oh-chan, you know it's not what you think it is, okay? She went over with her manager to inform us that her agency and ours had just agreed to let her guest on the show, along with the other casts of her movie to promote it,"

"I -" Ohno begins to say but he's quick to cut him off, kissing Ohno hard on the mouth before he is speaking again.

"Please tell me you didn't leave because you were jealous?"

Ohno doesn't speak for a whole minute and he honestly feels a little terrified at the growing silence until Ohno heaves a sigh and pinches his nose lightly, tenderly.

"Not really," Ohno says, "or maybe yes, but just a little bit,"

"Seriously?"

Ohno reaches up and ruffles his hair, leans down to press two soft kisses against the side of his temple.

"It's complicated,"

He shrugs, fingering the edges of Ohno's sleeves and leaning into Ohno's warmth seeping through his skin. "We broke up for a year and we suffered a whole lot because of it," he tells Ohno, "I don't think there's anything more complicated and worse than that. I'll accept complicated, I swear, but just. Don't shut _me_ out, Oh-chan, I can't stand it,"

Ohno is so quick in grasping his chin and kissing him quiet again, their tongues meeting in the middle as if it's their only reassurance that they're here, together, despite of everything. They are both gasping hard when Ohno pulls away, feels Ohno's thumb sliding across his heated cheek.

"I saw you with her and I realized how beautiful you two looked together," Ohno begins, placing a thumb over his lips to stop him from preempting Ohno again. He shuts his mouth close and holds on to Ohno's arm, the skin familiar beneath his hand. "How you could have the normal life you deserve, with her, that you could never have with me," Ohno follows in a low tone, his voice cracking in the middle that almost breaks his heart in half, too. "And it hit me hard, right then and there, that if maybe, if I'm not here, if I didn't feel this way about you, then maybe you could have try it one more time with her and -"

"You are _so_ stupid, Ohno Satoshi," he grumbles, kneeling up properly to take Ohno's face in his hands, kissing Ohno's visibly wet eyes this time around. "So stupid," he murmurs, kissing Ohno's face the same way Ohno did earlier. "So stupid, you are so stupid,"

"K-Kazu,"

"Don't, okay?" he says, and he means it to be threatening but it only came out sounding raspy, breathy, as he slams his mouth against Ohno's own. They are kissing again within seconds, pulling away when the hunger is at least a little bearable. "God, how can you even think that after everything we've been through? She and I are over, way, way over, even before you and I got together for real. She's a good person, and she deserves a man who will love her the way that I never could because my heart belongs to a stupid guy who thinks I deserve more than what I already have,"

Ohno's eyes are so so bright and amazed the next time he looks up to find them, and he has to kiss Ohno again, can't not, chaste and gentle as if he is reassuring himself more than he does Ohno that this, right here, is the closest they have of forever.

And he's not that stupid to let this go again.

Never.


	14. Verse 14

To be honest, he's an idiot.  
  
He really is, and for once, someone could tell it to his face and he will even wholeheartedly agree to it, there's no question about it, he won't even think twice.  
  
"Seriously, Nino, you're overreacting," Jun tells him, ever the observant fool and thus making him feel much, much worse. He can't even think past the panic rising in his throat and nothing Jun says is going to make a difference until Ohno says it himself.  
  
Of course he knows what an idiot he was during the filming. Anyone who has eyes had witnessed him made a special fool out of himself by fidgeting all throughout the damn thing while Masami didn't even bat an eye at him. She was so much better at handling things than he ever was, and well, what else can he say besides he's truly an idiot.  
  
"You're going to keep up with that?" Jun asks him, tone caught in between genuine worry and annoyance. Well, he can't exactly blame the younger man, even he himself isn't sure what he wants to do with himself now. "Seriously, Leader's been calling my phone nonstop. He's probably going batshit insane scouring the whole station just to find you,"  
  
"I -" he says, then pauses to swallow his worries down. "Do you think he's angry? Should I talk to him now or - "  
  
Jun reaches over and swats him on the head with his phone.   
  
"You're an idiot," Jun says, and he would have nodded if he has the brain capacity for it, but as it is, he's too damn busy trying not to hyperventilate to even think of anything as Jun swipes his phone screen and offers it to him without missing a beat. When he looks at it, he realized Jun has somehow called Ohno's phone number. "Tell him where you are or I will," Jun says as he shakes his head, cringing.  
  
On the other end, Ohno's "Jun-kun, hello? Is Nino with you? Hello?" can be heard.  
  
Jun sighs and takes the phone, slaps it against his left ear.  
  
"Studio 27B, Leader," Jun tells Ohno, while he curls onto himself, muttering something indistinct under his breath. "Fifth bathroom to the left, you know where it is, yeah?" Jun follows at the same time Jun aims a kick against his left leg.  
  
"Keep your shit together, Ninomiya," Jun tells him which would have earned him an appropriately thrown middle finger to the face but luckily for Jun, he's not in the mood for that.  
  
Not when all he wants is to disappear and never show his face ever again, if he can.  
  
Sadly, he can't do that.  
  
"Leader said he'll be here in ten," Jun informs him in a tone that sounded so cheerful, that jerk. "Should I go or -"  
  
He muffles his groans into the back of his palm and blindly aims a kick into Jun's direction, getting the stall's door instead.  
  
"Fuck you," he mutters with which Jun returns with a very cheerful, "Don't fuck here, or so help me I'm going to kill you both," before the door closes and he is left alone.  
  
Great.  
  
+++  
  
He is being kissed senseless before he has time to react, Ohno's hands tender on his face as Ohno backs him firmly against the stall wall. Ohno at least managed to lock the door behind him before the older man tugged him up from where he's been slumped at, kissing his eyes, his cheeks, his nose before Ohno's mouth found his.  
  
"What happened?" Ohno whispers, fingering the corners of his mouth as he keeps his eyes tightly shut. He can't even bring himself to look at Ohno's face now because he knows that if he do, he'll feel even worse than he already are.  
  
"Kazu, look at me," Ohno commands, but his tone betrays the commanding tone because he only sounded like he is begging. "Open your eyes and look at me, Nino, come on," Ohno follows and god, how can he not give in when Ohno sounded so sincere, so vulnerable; like it's equally killing him to be here and not know what the hell is running through Nino's head right now.   
  
"K-Kazu, please," Ohno begs, "Please look at me. Don't do this, you're scaring me, god damn it," Ohno curses but his voice cracks in the middle and that does it for him, he is opening his eyes to find Ohno's face so close to his, eyes so bright and his lips quivering with something akin to fear.  
  
He is reaching over to take Ohno's face in between his hands before he can stop himself, swiping the skin beneath Ohno's eyes gently.  
  
God, he feels like a jerk all of a sudden; he says nothing, watching Ohno watch him, waits until Ohno's breathing evens out and he doesn't look as crazed as he was minutes before.  
  
"Tell me what happened," Ohno says after a few moments of stunned silence. This time, Ohno's tone is firmer, sure. "You were okay all throughout the shoot, then once they wrapped everything up, you're gone. What happened?" Ohno repeats, brows furrowed.   
  
He shakes his head and purses his lips, lowering his gaze and refusing to meet Ohno's eyes. This time, Ohno doesn't let him. Ohno's fingers are on his cheek, tilting his face up again. When their eyes meet for the second time, the wild look on Ohno's eyes is back.  
  
"You want to tell me or should I guess?" Ohno asks, and he's not sure why it feels like this is heading somewhere dangerous. "Fine," Ohno states when he doesn't answer. "You're like this because you still want her, huh?"  
  
"What?"  
  
Ohno lets go. "It's obvious, you don't even need to draw me the fucking picture,"  
  
"Satoshi, that's not -"  
  
"Then tell me, goddamnit!" Ohno half-yells, pulling away when he reaches over to grab Ohno's arm. "I asked you but you kept quiet. I kept asking you but you didn't want to answer, what am I supposed to think then? You were fidgeting all throughout the shoot and I didn't want to give it any meaning because you told me - because you said you and her are way over, then why are you acting like this now -"  
  
"Oh-chan, that's not -"  
  
"Then why did you ran? Why did you leave and why were you hiding here? Is it because you're afraid I'd see through it? Because I did! I've known you long enough to know when you're -"  
  
He doesn't give Ohno the chance to say anything more as he is stepping forward to slam his mouth against Ohno's this time, hand curling around Ohno's neck and tilting his head to deepen the kiss. He parts Ohno's mouth open with his tongue, grumbles something that resembles Ohno's name when he pulls away for a brief second before he dives back in.  
  
When they part for air, he keeps their forehead pressed together, thumb gracing soft touches against the side of Ohno's mouth, counting each and every breathe leaving Ohno's slightly parted lips.  
  
"I ran because I am ashamed of how I acted," he whispers, keeps his hold around Ohno's neck as Ohno dutifully stays still. "and I acted that way not  because I still love her but because you were there and I didn't want you to see me fuck up but I did fuck up anyway and you saw it, too, so -"  
  
"Which part was it?" Ohno asks, sounding incredulous. "The part where you fuck up? Was that when you acted so awkward when you're not supposed to? Because seriously, everyone saw that, not just me,"  
  
He nods and Ohno freezes. "No no no, it's not because of anything, okay? I just. God, how do I explain it?"  
  
"With the truth?" Ohno returns.   
  
He sighs. "I - would you believe it if I say it was awkward because you were there?"  
  
"So this is my fault now?"  
  
He shakes his head and presses an affectionate thumb against the side of Ohno's neck. "No, I'm just saying that it'll be so much easier if you weren't there,"  
  
"Well, that's too bad because I'm an Arashi member, too," Ohno counters, sounding slightly pissed. He can't help it, he chuckles, leaning up to kiss Ohno's chin.   
  
"I'm sorry for acting that way," he starts, this time pressing himself flushed against Ohno, arms branding around Ohno's waist. "I was awkward because I knew what you thought about Masami and I, your doubts before and I didn't want you to see anything that will make you doubt us even more. But the more careful I tried to act, the more fucked up everything had become and I'm sorry, Oh-chan. I'm really sorry,"  
  
"So that was why you were by my side most of the time," Ohno exhales, his warm breath hitting the side of his face. "Sho-kun even tugged me aside once to tell me that you were being extra clingy,"  
  
"You realized that?"  
  
Ohno aims a gentle slap against the back of his head. "You might think that I'm dumb but I'm not really," Ohno tells him, "and I'm specially clever when it involves you. Just not when we're both being stupid together,"  
  
He can't help it, he grins, ducking his face and mashing it against the side of Ohno's neck. "I like it when we're being stupid together," he admits, feels Ohno's hand rubbing soothing circles down the small of his back.  
  
"I like it, too," Ohno admits quite readily, "What I don't like is when we're being stupid all by our lonesome selves and running off as if it will fix anything. I did that before, I wonder why you had to do it now, too? It's so stupid. You know we can just talk about it and work around it, instead of running away from it,"  
  
"Yeah," he agrees, "It's so stupid, really,"  
  
"It is," Ohno returns, reaching up to thread his fingers through his hair. "So can we not do this again, please? It's very unpleasant and we always sort of end up discussing things inside a bathroom stall, it's kind of disgusting, don't you think?"  
  
He nods, huffing out a muffled laughter against Ohno's shoulder. "Yes; ugh, Jesus, what the hell are we thinking?"  
  
  
Ohno shrugs his unoccupied shoulder and nudges him out of his hiding, grasping his chin at the same time and leaning over for a kiss.   
  
"So no more running away?"  
  
He nods. "No more,"  
  
Ohno thumbs the side of his mouth and kisses the tips of his nose. "I love you, don't you ever forget that, okay?"  
  
He nods and nods again. "I won't,"  
  
"Good," Ohno agrees, taking his hand. "Let's?"  
  
He smiles. "Let's."


	15. Verse 15

His phone vibrates yet again, probably the fifteenth time ever since he boarded his manager’s car ten minutes ago, biting his lips a second too late and grinning before he can even stop himself.  
  
And of course, it’s all Ohno’s fault. Again.  
  
  
Aug. 21, 2013 11:11pm  
From : Satoshi  
Subj : No subject  
  
 _It’s almost midnight, where are you?_  
  
 _Call me._  
  
  
He doesn’t. He grins and is about to pocket his phone when it vibrates again.  
  
  
Aug. 21, 2013 11:13pm  
From : Satoshi  
Subj : No subject  
  
 _Kazu, I’m hungry. Tell your manager to hurry or else I’ll die in extreme hunger and then Arashi will be leaderless and it’s his fault. Tell him that._  
  
 _PS. Why aren’t you calling me?_  
  
  
He shakes his head and pulls his cap low to cover almost half of his face, vaguely wondering what in hell he did in his previous life to deserve this. Until now, exactly three months since he and Ohno have gotten back together, he still couldn’t believe it, still couldn’t believe he’s this lucky for being able to get back what he thought he’d already lost forever.  
  
He’d been so scared about trusting Ohno again, that much is true, but then he would go to bed at night and his fear goes to bed with him too, curled around him and holding him as if their fears mirror each other even without them addressing it out loud.   
  
But he knows now that it is silly for him to feel that way. Ohno is scared too, it’s obvious, what with the careful way Ohno acts around him, treating him as if he’s vulnerable, something that could easily break with just the tiniest provocation.  
  
And maybe that’s true, maybe he’s not as strong as he thought he is but with Ohno, he knows he can be invincible. With Ohno, he feels like he can do everything, conquer everything knowing that Ohno is there to back him up, tug him forward if need be. And he knows that it’s the same thing with Ohno, the intensity of what they feel for each other is something that still baffles him, even now.   
  
Because he knows Ohno loves him as much as he loves the older man, and it’s as scary as it is wonderful, being able to find someone who loves him just as much.  
  
His phone vibrates yet again and he doesn’t even need to check it to know that it’s from Ohno, again.  
  
  
Aug. 21, 2013 11:23pm  
From : Satoshi  
Subj : No subject  
  
 _You  better be on your way home now or I’m seriously leaving the apartment in ten minutes to find you if I don’t get a reply from you._  
  
 _I’m serious. Don’t say I didn’t warn you._  
  
 _PS. I even bought a cake. To celebrate, you know? Today’s an important day, afterall, or have you forgotten?_  
  
  
He didn’t, of course not. Three months down the road and he knows he’s already wishing for three months more, three years more, and more and more and more to spend with Ohno Satoshi by his side.   
  
He fishes around in his pocket to find the small box he puts in there, smiling when his fingers found it. He doesn’t take it out because he doesn’t want to risk his manager seeing it, or the state his face will probably end up in when his manager sees it.   
  
He taps the screen and decides to reply Ohno before the older man does something outrageous, like, say, calling his bandmates and his manager (and the whole Johnnys management) and request for an impromptu search party to find him.   
  
  
Aug. 21, 2013 11:28pm  
To : Satoshi  
Subj : No subject  
  
 _Please don’t tell me you’re considering calling our management office to ask them for an impromptu search party for me because they will only laugh at you. The same way I am doing right now._  
  
 _Stop it. You’re being silly._  
  
 _And I’ll be there in like, ten minutes. So stop the whining and get the bath ready. I want to soak in before I hit the bed._  
  
 _PS. What’s the cake for again?_  
  
  
He presses send, biting back his grin as he does so.   
  
Not even a minute later, he gets a reply.  
  
  
Aug. 21, 2013 11:29pm  
To : Satoshi  
Subj : No subject  
  
 _GET YOUR ASS IN HERE AND I’LL TELL YOU WHAT THE CAKE IS FOR, YOU BRAT._  
  
 _PS. You’re lucky I love you because if not. Tsk._  
  
He smiles because how can he not? It’s too easy to imagine Ohno’s pout as he types the message, and he’s even this close to replying him with ‘What do you know, I fucking love you too,’ but holds himself back because then his manager is parking the car in front of his apartment building and mumbling something about another scheduled CM shoot the day after.  
  
Oh right. Tomorrow’s his day off. Ohno’s too.  
  
“Got it,” he tells his manager at the same time he is pushing the passenger’s door open. “I’ll see you on Friday then,” he says, waving a hand at his manager and walking off. He’s half-running before he even realized it, but oh well, that can’t be helped.  
  
A celebratory cake, bath, and an obviously grumpy boyfriend are waiting for him, afterall.  
  
+++  
  
“Oh-chan, you here?” he calls once he’s passed the genkan, dropping his workbag on his way to the living room and looking around. The apartment is so quiet save from the sounds of his own heart thumping away in his chest.   
  
“Oh-chan?” he calls again, and just then he hears something from the direction of the bedroom, or more specifically, from the bathroom.  
  
He smiles before he even realized it, his body moving on autopilot and walking straight towards the direction of the bedroom, peeling his clothes off his body on his way there.  
  
+++  
  
He is treated with the sight of Ohno soaking in the bath, arms hanging limply and his eyes closed. There are soap bubbles all over him, and god, his insides stir with the urge to chase them away with his fingertips as he straddles Ohno.  
  
The trouble now though is that Ohno is asleep, which makes groping and molesting him a little difficult. He chuckles under his breath and tugs the last piece of clothe he has on, his boxers, and walks around to where Ohno is resting his head against. Then, slowly and quietly, he reaches over to cover Ohno’s eyes and waits until Ohno stirs from his slumber.  
  
“Ni – No?” Ohno calls in that admittedly sexy, sleep-mussed tone of his and he snorts, feeling justified for wanting to swallow those sounds with his mouth.   
  
God, it’s so unfair sometimes, for him to find Ohno so undeniably sexy that just the sight of Ohno is enough to make his throat dry, his fingers twitch to reach out and touch him.   
  
“Well, unless you’re expecting someone else, that is,” he returns, hoping he sounded a little disapproving but he knows he only sounded vaguely amused, if not a little breathless.   
  
“You’re late,” is Ohno’s simple reply, tugging his hands away before Ohno is curling his fingers around his wrist. He is being pulled close before he even has time to blink, chuckling when Ohno’s sleepy eyes widen just the slightest bit when Ohno’s gaze settles on him.  
  
“And naked,” Ohno follows, a slow, almost predatory grin graces his face and he swallows hard, feels Ohno’s eyes roaming all over him hungrily.   
  
He bites his bottom lip and lowers his gaze. “Well, didn’t I tell you to prepare the bath because I want to soak in before going to bed?” he says, then, “It’s not my fault that you decided to go in first and then fall asleep while you’re in it,” he says, accusingly.  
  
Ohno simply grins but doesn’t let go of his hand. “I wasn’t sleeping, I was meditating,”  
  
“Right,”  
  
Ohno nods, finds Ohno’s gaze locked in between his legs and he swears his dick stirs in sudden interest.   
  
“Well anyway, since you’re already here, and already naked, why don’t you just join me?”  
  
He arches his brows at Ohno, wishing he looks as put out as he pretends to be but as it is, there’s no hiding the fact that the idea entices him.   
  
Ohno shifts then, beckoning him over with his arms open wide.   
  
“Come on, Kazu,” Ohno calls, voice sweet and coaxing, and grinning like he’s won something he’s been wanting all his life.  
  
He rolls his eyes to the heaven and takes Ohno’s hands, lets Ohno guide him with that teasing half-smile on Ohno’s face.  
  
+++  
  
He squeaks, surprised when he ended up on top of Ohno, blushing furiously when his ass collides with Ohno’s obvious hard on.   
  
“There’s precious room for two, Satoshi, why do I have to straddle you?” he grumbles, fighting the urge to laugh and giggle because despite the lies, he knows this is exactly the position he wants eversince he came in and found Ohno here.   
  
Trust Ohno to read his mind and act on the things he wants even though he wouldn’t say it. Ohno simply smiles before Ohno slides his palms, wet and distractingly cold, across his bare arms.  
  
“Because I want us to be facing each other and because it’s perfect… this position is perfect, don’t you think?”  
  
“How am I supposed to enjoy this if all I’m feeling is your twitching dick against my ass?” he counters, making it sound like he’s whining but it’s difficult to stay in character when his voice came out husky and breathy. God damn it.  
  
Ohno grins, sheepish, boyish. He feels this urge to kiss that smile away, feel the way it melts under his tongue. “That is seriously not my fault,” Ohno tells him, looking utterly serious all of a sudden.   
  
“And you’re saying it’s my fault?”  
  
Ohno blinks innocently but the way his right hand disappears from gripping his arm only to reappear down in between them makes the gesture so so delicious. He is gasping sharply when Ohno’s fingers close around his length, tries swallowing back his moans when Ohno all but leans in presses a soft kiss against the side of his mouth.  
  
“Not really, no,” Ohno whispers, “I’m just saying it’s my body’s natural reaction upon seeing you naked and half-hard,”  
  
“Satoshi –“  
  
Ohno lets him go but only because he is worming the same hand – wet and still distractingly cold – around the back of his neck to draw him in, kissing him hard and fast before he could even blink. They are kissing within seconds, Ohno’s tongue curling against his own.  
  
When they part for air, Ohno’s hand remains against the back of his neck, their foreheads pressed together.   
  
“Nino, I love you. I love you so much, Nino,” Ohno chants, mostly against his mouth, and it’s all he could do not to pull the older man into him and kiss him quiet again. His chest is heaving and it’s not just because of the kisses they’ve shared, but because Ohno has once again caught him off-guard.  
  
Because it always happens when Ohno tells him something that makes heartbeat flutter crazily beneath his ribcage, when Ohno say something that he himself should be saying more often. Then he feels Ohno’s hand, soft and gentle, cupping his cheek, before Ohno is pushing his fingers into his hair, smoothing his bangs away before Ohno is leaning in to kiss his eyes.  
  
“Three months, Nino,” Ohno whispers, and right then and there, he feels like crying, feels like jumping out from his skin so he can crawl his way unto Ohno, stick himself into Ohno and never let go. “The best three months of my life because I’m with you,”  
  
“Oh-chan,”  
  
“Is it alright to ask for three more, and three more, and three more –“  
  
“Yes,” he returns, breathless and seriously on the verge of crying, taking Ohno’s face in between his hands and kissing Ohno’s eyes, his mouth, his nose, his cheeks as he folds himself against Ohno. “Yes, yes please,”  
  
Ohno answers him with kisses, and they are more than enough, for now.  
  
+++  
  
They are on the bed, Ohno toweling his hair as he stays dutifully still. They are in their sweats, he’s wearing Ohno’s and Ohno is wearing his, but neither of them minds.   
  
“So in the end, we didn’t get to do it in the bath, too bad, huh?” Ohno says, like he’s thinking about it and he’s been thinking about it long and hard. He giggles because how can he not, grabbing the nearest pillow and shoving it into his face to muffle his giggles.   
  
“Yeah, too  bad,” he agrees when he has managed to unbury his face from the pillow, and turning his head to find Ohno looking thoughtfully down at him. “What?”   
  
Ohno smiles and it’s the kind that pulls painfully at his heartstrings immediately after he sees it, because he knows what it means. It’s the one that says ‘ _I’m so glad you’re here, so happy we’re together’_ and the one that simply means, _‘I’m in love with you’_.  
  
“Tomorrow, we start another day,” Ohno tells him, reaching over to touch his cheek, the side of his mouth, the bridge of his nose. “Kazu,”  
  
He nods because that’s the only thing he’s capable of doing now, because he doesn’t trust his voice enough not to falter when his heart is doing that stupid dance inside his chest.   
  
But he gets it, that look on Ohno’s face because he knows he’s got the same written all over his, mirroring Ohno’s own.   
  
He leans further into Ohno’s touch but says nothing.   
  
He doesn’t need to. Their hearts beating as one right now is enough and he knows that Ohno knows it, too.  
  
It’s enough.


End file.
